What would you do?
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|Tue, 05-13-2003 - 9:13pm|
So last month I called the guy out of the blue, we talked briefly and everything was the same with him. He had wanted to maintain contact again but I said "No thanks." and left it at that...for a week. A week later I mailed him a letter. Oh man, I do regret that a little, it was totally done in a PMS moment, but it's done. I only regret it because I feel like I exposed my vulnerability, but at the same time I let him know that I understand that he has no intention of EVER leaving his family, which of course is the right thing to do. One point I did make too, was that IF keeping the family together is SOOOO important to him, he needs to give them his undivided attention. Though I believe that he is really more concerned about keeping his assets and maintaining his current lifestyle than "breaking up" his family-which I also wrote in the letter. But in the end I signed off in a Goodbye Forever sort of way. I added a p.s. though, (which in retrospect I think was a mistake) and said that if he had anything he wanted to express I would hear him out in fairness. This sort of has something to do with when we broke up 2 years ago and I did ALL the talking then, he had tried to say some stuff to me, but I thought it was just going to be the usual "I love you with all my heart, BUT..." and I refused to listen to it.
It's been about 2 weeks now since he's gotten the letter and (surprise) no word from him; and I am sure he's gotten it. So the other night, well after midnite I just happened to be standing in the alley behind my apartment building and who do I see cruising down the way? I don't live near his home, and had I seen him while I was standing in the front of the building along the busy street I wouldn't think much, but in the alley behind my building? He won't stop or say anything though. He acts like he doesn't see me and I do the same. I had mentioned that in my letter too, that I know what he's been up to. Well I don't know for sure who's been calling my place, but I am sure when I've spotted him (only 3 times in a 2 year period I've seen him).
Now that I've sort of confronted him I'm not so freaked out about this crap. I guess before I thought that maybe he was checking up on me to see whether or not I had separated from my H, and I guess that's sort of why I hoped maybe he would be motivated to do something. But after the most recent phone call I see this guy as a CAKEMAN. He just wants it all: house, wife, kids, cars, and mistress. That's not for me, and I mentioned that in the letter too.
So should I do something about his creeping around? I really don't think so, but some of my close friends are curious about his motivations. One person thinks I should confront him in person. I don't want to do anything like that though because I am sure he'd just deny it and I feel like it would make ME look weird or paranoid. I don't think this behavior warrants any legal action because he doesn't say or do anything; and the times I've caught him in the streets it's been near my home and work (which both are out of the way for him to just be happening to cruise by) but not at the times I would normally be there-so I don't think he's particularly "looking" for me. It's weird I guess, but I really don't see it that way. I would probably do something like that. Just cruise around and think about "the way we were". I don't know. What would you do?