what's my problem???
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what's my problem???
| Mon, 12-21-2009 - 3:31pm |
I'm feeling somewhat decent today, even tho xap is really on my mind. Then all of suddent I remember something he said on the day I broke things off. He told me how he was starting to think about how he would rather be here

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Don't even go there.
Whenever I need a reminder the MM Code Book is it....Of course now I enjoy a good laugh when I read it and not beat myself up too bad about it. :)
His words are that words! In no way can he back them up to you but they sound so sweet and convincing, don't they?!?! Hate how they do that. LOL Of course then I try to flipside it....if I will believe that without proof, what is wrong with me?! Makes ya think somedays.
You are right...they are words and mean nothing unless the actions follow which will not happen. If it did, wouldn't matter...wouldn't be the same for him them...no secrets, no escapades, that isn't fun. The whole fun is the forbidden.
Take care
Hope
Caribu hang in there.
Like another poster said, they are just words from his mouth.
NC since Dec. 9th 2009
No Contact = No N
Everyone replied in reference to xAP and "words are just words".
Comments and
Problem is that you are falling for the oldest line in the book. Comments such as your what your xmarried man said are what I would refer to as 'dangling the carrot' (NO!...not THAT carrot!:)
I just needed to chime in here b/c today I'm having the Monday hangover (not a real hangover, but Monday's are a bad day normally for me....I posted about it yesterday).
Anyway, this thread has helped me feel better....thanks all.
Yup I too got the "one day" line often. Even when we were out of the A for a long time but we still communicated the words "one day" were our buzz word to keep us connected. That was the word that meant ILY w/o saying it. Laughable now but I hung onto those words for dear life for a long time.
Right now his action of N/C and my action of N/C is what we both had to finally do. That was the only action that was the right thing to do, anything else is just wrong since we are both still married. That is what I remind myself of daily if I start to feel sad....it smacks me back into reality and reminds me that xMM is not worth blowing up my entire world for.
If my H ever checked my phone records I would be so screwed and all for what , a text that said all of "hi" once a week. My H would never believe that one , nor should he. So, I've learned and I only hope that I can move on peacefully w/o anyone getting hurt.
Mickey
You seem strong today.
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