When the affair is discovered....
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| Wed, 10-20-2004 - 8:13am |
Maria wrote: <<<>>>>
Ladies, this is one of the most common reactions of MM when an affair is discovered. They will NOT stand up for you whether you've been in an affair for 5 weeks, 5 months or 5 years. MM will drop you like a hot potato. IOW, the *Fantasy* will come to an abrupt halt and you are left dangling in the wind with *rejection* dripping off your face.
After 4.5 years I abruptly ended my A because one day I began listening to that little voice in the back of my mind that kept repeating, "End it now before someone finds out." Affairs have the uncanny ability to mute that little voice that we ALL hear but intentionally ignore, because it is *uncomfortable* and interferes with that *feel good* stuff. Well, just how good is it going to feel when he announces that you are history because the wife found out? So there you stand humbling yourself before him, begging for an explanation, and all he can say is "Didn't you know that my FAMILY comes first?"
Please tune into that little voice that is trying to tell you something. IMO, it saved me.
~True~

I didn't feel guilty AT ALL during the A until about a week before it ended. Then all of a sudden that little voice in the back of my head says 'you're going to get caught...get out,get out, get out'.
I'm REALLY glad I listened.
On the other hand, i'm not sure that it wasn't the same little voice that told me, not so long ago 'do it, no-one will find out, just this once'.
sigh...if only I could hear Josh Hartnett in my head. That would be good :)
m x.
Hah! Thanks for the laugh.
<<>>
Ah yes, that little "Devil made me do it" voice? It's NOT the same as the *voice of reason* that we refuse to listen to, while it continually resonates *the truth* inside of our heads. <<>>>>
My main point of my post though, was about how easily MM's dismiss their AP's, or minimize the importance of everything you shared, once their spouse finds out. I was able to avoid that humiliation and rejection by ending it before any *Sh*t hit the fan* ;) Just something for all of you to consider when you have those weak moments...
~True~