when does it get easier
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when does it get easier
| Thu, 02-04-2010 - 4:25pm |
when does it stop hurting? My xap boss just called about ordering product for the spring. I am already having a tough time dealing with things. Although I handeled the call well only talked about work, no not true he did ask how my dad was doing with radiation. But it was very professional. I know this is how it has to be, but god it hurts like he**. I immediatly hung up and came here. Having a tough time already today. I read it gets easier and sometimes I think it does, but not today. It is so hard to see him in town with everyone around. My heart is breaking and I have to put on a smily face. I don't hate this man, and I know I probably should, but I have to tell u I was such a bi**h at work for the past 2 yrs, why he did fire me I don't know. Actually I quit once and he called and said I need you to work for me. I get paid well....Love what I do, and have free roam to run this store for him. I want to go back to just being on a friendly proffesional work enviorement.
And I know he does also. Sorry for venting,
loveless
And I know he does also. Sorry for venting,
loveless

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LL,
<>>
You sort have answered your own question. It does, with time, get easier but there will be difficult days and it's good you came here to vent about it. Hang in there, Love. Remember, you are dealing with a lot these days, and XMM used to be your escape. Now you have to face the music all on your own...but remember, you have help from your friends here on Endings to get you through those tough days. ;-)
(((Hugs)))
~ Iddy~
~Iddy~
Hey, there
I started a thread similar to this one a few weeks ago! I'm something like 2+ months post a and I still have days when it's hard. I miss him. I hate him. I cry over him.
Hi Loveless,
I am chiming in to support you because I too am in a similar situation, sort off. I too had an A with my boss for about a year and I am still working with him, so I can so relate to what you are going through now. It sucks and hurts. But please take comfort in knowing that you are doing the right thing by getting off the A rollercoaster. Yes it hurts like hell when the relationship you thought was special suddenly goes up in smoke and then you are forced to interact with the person like a stranger. But you can do it and it sounds like you are handling your situation very well. Please believe me when I say that when your boss is being professional with you, it is actually a good thing and will help speed up your healing process !! So I encourage you to accept your boss's professionalism towards you with both hands and play it right along with him. I say this because when I ended my A almost a year ago, initially my boss was respectful and I had LC with him for about 3-4 months. The first couple of months were excruciating and there were times the pain was so intense that I had to leave the office and find a private place to cry. Then honestly it got easier and I booked some holidays to get away which helped tremendously. After that I was actually starting to be able work with him without letting our A get in the way too much. However, then my boss started to get flirty again - but there was NO FREAKING WAY I was going to jump back into that hall of hell again !! So I told him we are done and to cut it out, but he continues to act like a jerk and will not give up. I am getting frustrated with him because it does play on my emotions and makes working together awkward. I had this job for 21 years and love my job and am excellent at it and it would break my heart to have to quit - but I also know that it is a price that I may have to pay. So Loveless the point I am trying to make is that it is a GOOD THING if your boss is being professional and if you accept that and play along with him, you can definitely normalize your relationship quicker than you think. So hang in there and FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT !! Gullable.
I know in my heart that it has sucked with him for so long....But I just would not let go. This time its different, I have a lot on my plate but I have so many great things going on also. Thank You for the hug I needed it
love
Hi Free
How did you go from 100% to 5% in 2 months? I feel the same saga as you Hate 1 min. want the next. It does suck, but I am going to do it I have no choice.
love
I think I remember some of your posts from last yr. See We started the affair in 2006. I would say was awsome for 8-10months. Then he says hard to cheat on wife. I believe him, because after that not much sex more friend coffee lunch etc. But sex once in a while. I don't want this anymore. I do love him, he says he loves me, but that is neither here nor there. I thought I could handle what I now know was crumbs. I think he does love me, but wrong place wrong time whatever. Maybe I am fooling myself. Anyway i want to just work for him now, nothing more it hurts to much
Good luck
love
Hey, love~
Well, for starters, my xap isn't my boss. He is an old flame reignited and he lives 4 states away, so it does help that he's not right in front of me. I'm not sure how I would handle the situation if he was my boss...it's one of those things where I don't know
Thank You Free
Today I am better.....ups and downs but i am plugging away
love
I am hoping it gets a little better every day.
NC since 2/4/2010
Freeconfused,
You and I started this journey together, I could have written your post...i am 9 weeks NC and you could NOT have said things better.
Something about this 8-12 weeks tho...its just liberating. I feel joy again. I smile. Its not some fake high, its real and pure. I get sad on occasion. I have not been here lately and i noticed, he would creep in my head a little more often as of late. So I am so happy to be back...I needed you all. I really did. I was slipping. thx for your post. Hope we continue and can not wait till we are tweens!! We should be big girls thaen...LOL
Edited 2/6/2010 2:34 pm ET by luvinmeforever10
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida
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