Why did he have to show up?
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Why did he have to show up?
| Fri, 04-23-2010 - 10:39pm |
I have come to these boards every day for strength. The other day I had a staff person contact xap about putting another client in his apartment. I have completely taken myself out of the whole thing. Yesterday another coworker asked me to help move her client out of the apartment and I did. It was a very emotional day just being in there. I did not see xap or speak to him but I do know it is his apartment. I really broke down yesterday crying and feeling real bad. (this is the first breakdown in almost 2 weeks. Well today my staff person brought 2 clients over to see the apartment and let them know that I would be getting them everything that they need for the apartment. My staff person came back to the shelter and said one of the clients wants the apartment. I had to get donations and went with my coworker to put in my truck and bring to the apartment. She called xap to make sure the neighbors had the key to let us in, xap said that he would call him and wanted to know how long before we got there she said 10 min. he said ok I will call him. When we pulled on the St there was xap truck!!!! And he was standing outside waiting for us. My heart started pounding outside my chest. I started shaking so bad!! I got out of the truck and his DD was there and said hi to me I acted calm and cool. Talked to her for a min. then the neighbors were out there I talked with them and I NEVER SAID A WORD TO HIM!!!! I did not even look at him. This is the beginning. I honestly give the woman on here so much credit to work with xap. I don't think I could do it. I felt so good pretending that he was not there. Why would he go there? What was the purpose? Did he think that I would go right back and talk to him? I don't know but what I can say is I felt so empowered today. I never believed that I could ignore him but I am on the right road. I understand some days are going to be better then others but today was a very interesting day.

MAB,
It sounds like you handled
~Iddy~
MAB,
You nailed it! U r so strong. Look at you. I do not know that I could have handled that as well as you did when I was a newbie. GOOD for you. Really. That a way to show em. I am sure he is still wondering WTH? LOL...he is used to having such an effect on you. He does not know that you have EAS and you have made a decision to start a new life for yourself and you are going to do it despite good, bad and interesting days...way to go.
Just a slight warning....i do not want you to obsess over this although you might anyway. I do not think it was a coincidence that he was there and I also do not think his ego took you ignoring it too well. Just be ready for a fishing attempt should would arise. Protect yourself and avoid it at all costs.
Again, I am so proud of you. U did great and really should realize that you are so much stronger than you think....
Luvin
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida