XAP: fantasy vs. reality
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| Wed, 07-28-2010 - 11:06pm |
Fantasy: Single
Reality: Married
Fantasy: Kind, caring and selfless
Reality: Mean, cold and selfish
Fantasy: Healthy and nurturing
Reality: Unhealthy, toxic and controlling
Fantasy: Always there for me
Reality: Never there for me
Fantasy: Puts me first
Reality: Put me after family, work, golf...
Fantasy: Spends all his time with me
Reality: Squeezed me in, when it suited him
Fantasy: Tells the world about our relationship
Reality: Hidden in the darkness, no one knows
Fantasy: Good looking and fit
Reality: Looks old and tired, gained 40 lbs.
Fantasy: Treats me like a queen
Reality: Treated me horribly
Fantasy: Fulfilling intimate life
Reality: Sex on the floor, when it suited him
Fantasy: Wonderful communication
Reality: No communication
Fantasy: Makes me feel good about life and myself
Reality: Made me feel lower than I've ever felt
Fantasy: We live happily ever after
Reality: Everything I thought I had with XAP was a fantasy.
How I let myself be fooled for so long, I don't know. I guess I can survive a long time on crumbs. My feelings are all over the place, but I'm really glad I'm here. I'm not compromising what I want and deserve ever again.
Bodhi

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I'm not compromising what I want and deserve ever again. - AGREE.
When the fog lifts, and you start to see the differences then you are starting to heal.
You amaze me at your gains.
We are proud of you.
We can only count on one person in this life of ours and that's ourselves.
We only miss what could have been.
We only miss what could have been. I know I don't miss what it really was.
Livex -
I think separating the fantasy man from the real man is very hard. I got stuck yesterday wanting fantasy man to ride in and save the day. I hope my post helps you too :) Have a strong day.
Bodhi
Liberty -
<<<>>>
Not really, I just did the 3 or 4 year do-it-yourself-home course before I found EAS! ha :)
Bodhi
Thank you Rather :)
I've written stuff like this to myself before. And then I would always think "why do I want this guy?" I'm proud of you too - 15 weeks is amazing. Have a relaxing fishing trip!
Bodhi
Thank you Clarity :) I'm thinking if I want a fantasy, I might as well make him Matt Damon at least...
Bodhi
BOHDI......
HE MEANT A FISHING TRIP ...... not hook line and sinkers .... an AP one !!!!
No Cheating, No Compromise, No Contact!
NC since
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