Zenseday

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Zenseday
39
Wed, 12-01-2010 - 11:43am

I spent so much time during my A worrying about "losing" XAP. I realized after ending it, that I didn't really have to worry about losing him, I had actually lost myself. Everything in my life was about him. His work, his life, his vacations, his choices. I stopped living. I lost friends. My self worth was totally tied to him. I struggled for SO long - accepting his completely unacceptable behavior. Of course, his behavior was unacceptable only to me because of my messed up expectations. I am responsible for determining MY expectations and what is acceptable. How can I expect others to treat me with dignity and respect if I don’t treat myself that way? One of the many quotes I've seen on this board and have weaved into my life is "We teach people how to treat us."

A long time ago, I made a list of 100 things about myself - it's fun and challenging - you should try it. You'll actually be surprised how hard it becomes to come up with the last 20 things or so! My list is completely random. I opened up the file the other day to remind myself of who I am. If it helps you, post some things unique to you. Here are 10 of my 100:

I don't like going to the post office.

I am a control freak.

I can scuba dive.

I've never had ketchup, mustard, mayo or pretty much any other condiment...

I don't like being told what to do.

I love alleys.

I sing in the car.

I've been to Honduras.

I love all types of movies.

I was in a tornado when I was 3.

Have a wonderful Zenseday :smileyhappy: Know who you are and take great pride in that person. Set boundaries, and keep them.

Bodhi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
In reply to: bodhi2010
Wed, 12-01-2010 - 11:50pm
Bodhi, I really enjoyed reading everyones responses. I'm going to keep working on my list! :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Thu, 12-02-2010 - 2:17am

The social scientist in me is embracing the subjective, & totally historically situated and temporally located nature of my top 10 list (that was for you Foggy):

1) I'm top in my PhD program - even though I have to work the equivalent of 3 jobs, and I homeschool my children to boot.

2) I am funny - like really funny - in "real" life.

3) I prefer Birks to shoes, and tent camping to hotels

4) I don't shave unless it is REALLY imperative

5) I prefer scruffy men to clean shaven

6) My younger brother is one of my BFFs

7) If you're having a baby, you want me in your life (I was a midwifery student)

8) Prior to university, I made my living as a professional dancer & model

9) I consider myself an activist

10) I LOVE looooonnnngggggg road trips, and I have an uncanny ability to go HOURS without peeing which makes me a great road tripping partner!

TU.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Thu, 12-02-2010 - 6:31am

I absolutely LOVED this thread!! I think we should do this every few weeks, but create it as it's own thread. Might get even

Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Thu, 12-02-2010 - 6:34am
Vanessa--Meant to ask you if you were broadcast or print? I was print for about 5 years. I still absolutely LOVE local politics. There's no better drama, IMO. I don't watch much TV but I can't give up my newspaper!!
Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
In reply to: bodhi2010
Thu, 12-02-2010 - 12:26pm

TU-

"I'm top in my PhD program - even though I have to work the equivalent of 3 jobs, and I homeschool my children to boot."

YOU HAVE SOOOO GOT TO SHUT THE FUG UP!!!

seriously, quit it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Thu, 12-02-2010 - 2:38pm

I'm sooo late responding to this post, but better late than never, right?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Thu, 12-02-2010 - 8:12pm
Hi Always

I was in print. My H is into politics :)

xxxoo
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-25-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Wed, 12-08-2010 - 5:29am

Better late than never.... it was all i could do to read the whole thread in my limited EAS time these days BUT

NC is still lurking and alive and kicking so here are the 10 things that make me unique !!

1. I LOVE Chilli's

New Choices, New Chapter,


New Challenges,

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2010
In reply to: bodhi2010
Wed, 12-08-2010 - 1:13pm
Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. I started looking inside and went NC October 15, 2010

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