About to meet HER!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2009
About to meet HER!!!
10
Wed, 09-09-2009 - 10:46pm

So because we some what work together and our circle of friends and associates overlaps a lot, I'm about to come face to face with HER - the Mrs., my unbeknownst to her, nemesis!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2009
Thu, 09-10-2009 - 1:30am

This is the time when your ideas about what sort of life he has at home come to question. Seeing her as a real woman just like you may cause you to review his excuses to why he is with you. Disliking the W is easy when they have no "face" and they are just an object that your AP goes home to every night. If you do like her, then you will most probably have the added guilt that she cant be as bad as portrayed by your AP.
I certainly do not envy you on this holiday but i really hope you manage to get around this potential sticky mess. Have a great trip!

SB

Que Sera Sera - Whatever will be, will be.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2008
Thu, 09-10-2009 - 4:33am
Oh Lacy! What a nightmare! :x

Well, from experience, I (by accident) after this 4th of July got taken by surprise by my AP's wife. I was at my work talking to him in the hallways when his wife appear out of no where! Let me tell you... its not pleasant seeing her face to face. I only had to be there for a minute then ran the opposite way. It just makes me so jealous seeing her and all these other emotions come through you...

I really feel sorry for you... is there anyway you can NOT go?

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2008
Thu, 09-10-2009 - 8:11am

OMG! ((HUGS)) to you!! I too am dreading the day I have to meet Mrs AP. I met her years ago in passing when they were first dating but just said Hi and didn't think anything of it at the time since we weren't a we yet.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Thu, 09-10-2009 - 10:23am

now is the time for the men on this board to come forward...


ok, mm in a's, this lovely situation is a perfect example of


how female ap is expected to 'accept' the 'other' woman in her


r with you, however, your w is not expected to accept your ap


as the 'ow' in your a.


do you even have an inkling of what the emotional trauma the


female ap is expected to endure but you protect your w from the


same trauma...does this put any of this into any perspective at all


for the mm.....


do mm ap's have any concept of how degrading this situation is







iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2007
Thu, 09-10-2009 - 10:58am
I think that maybe it is because the AP chooses to be in a R with the MM while the W is clueness and not given a choice about sharing her H. I believe that when we put ourselves into these kinds of situations we have to either accept that the W comes first or choose to get out of the A and have someone where will will be put first. It's unreasonable to be involved in a secret R and not expect to be hidden from the W.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2009
Thu, 09-10-2009 - 11:19pm
I'm a mm, but my ap is also married so I cant answer your question. I guess the reason I'm posting is because you make it sound like there aren't married woman with single ap's on this board. Why do you exclude them?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2006
Fri, 09-11-2009 - 8:50am
Let's face it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Fri, 09-11-2009 - 12:19pm

did not mean to exclude mw with sm ap, but it is more the


norm on this board for sw to be involved with mm







iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Fri, 09-11-2009 - 3:11pm

having been a sw in an a with mm, all i can do is offer advice now


from the looking outside of the fishbowl response. when you are


emotionally tied up in an a with a mm as a sw, you will always


be on the losing end, period. he has no motivation to leave his m,


he is getting away with the a, so he has nothing to lose, and


if and when d day comes, he will blame it all on the sw. plain and


simple.


as far as mw and mm in an a, i cannot comment, as i don't have


the experience on that side of the fence to comment, but sw in an


a with mm, mm will also do what he can to 'keep control' of the


situation at all costs, which means just as you suspected,


your pov means nothing.







iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2009
Sat, 09-12-2009 - 12:40am

UGH!