affair

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2009
affair
4
Fri, 05-01-2009 - 9:42am

Hello everyone,


I been with my boyfriend for 16 years.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
In reply to: goddess_mslola
Fri, 05-01-2009 - 12:09pm

You're 40 years old. It's time to get real. Are you self sufficient? I mean can you support yourself and children without any other men to rescue you? What you're doing now has the potential to get dangerously ugly if your LIBF finds out that you're cheating with a younger man.

>>>" I have told him please let go."<<<

You're a grown woman of 40. You don't need his permission to go seek your happiness. It is not written anywhere that says you "have" to stay where you're not happy. Even if you were M there's alway D. Stop justifying what you're doing because you're not getting what you want from LIBF. It is you're responsibility to make "YOUR" life work for you.

I would suggest tying up your loose ends, meaning sit LIBF down and make a clean break. Tell him what you have together is not working for you anymore and that if he wants to try and salvage it then you both need to go couples counseling. If he doesn't agree then you tell him you'll leave. Meantime, put AP in a shelf for now while you clean up you're mess. Otherwise, you're not giving yourself or the 29-years old guy a chance at any future.

Shadow Word generated at Pimp-My-Profile.com


"People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within."


- Ramona L. Anderson
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2005
In reply to: goddess_mslola
Fri, 05-01-2009 - 12:18pm

ms lola,

i'm sorry for your trouble. it's not so easy, is it? getting someone out of your life - with children involved, with a home, with finances.

but i'm not sure that jumping from one relationship to another is the answer. can you separate and take time for yourself and your children before committing to another man?

your new man seems so impatient. i wonder if he is another person who wants to control you. when what you need is to be in control for yourself. please don't feel pressured by him and let him know - if he loves you - he will give you the time you need.

Take care,
Mrs.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2009
In reply to: goddess_mslola
Fri, 05-01-2009 - 12:45pm

Yes, You are right.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2009
In reply to: goddess_mslola
Fri, 05-01-2009 - 12:57pm

Thank you for your respond




Edited 5/1/2009 1:50 pm ET by goddess_mslola