Am I getting bored with my OM?!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Am I getting bored with my OM?!
8
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 7:41pm
I fear I may be getting bored with my OM. It use to be so fun! I'd think about him all the time and wonder what he was doing and if he was thinking of me ... we'd sneak off to anywhere anytime just to "be together" (one time even on an abondoned railraod bed right by houses!) ... I (me!) wanted to have sex with him every chance I got even!

Now ... I don't know. I just don't care anymore I guess.

I avoid sneaking off with him now and I don't really care what he's up too when I'm not there.

Why? I have a couple theories I suppose ... he use to have another girl who wanted him, but he stopped that because he fell in love with me. Maybe its that he isn't a prize to be won for an afternoon anymore. Maybe its because he told me he loved me. Maybe I'm just bored with him. Maybe I'm starting to feel real sorry for my bf (not that he'd ever find out or anything, but he's so nice to me).

I know when I started I really dug the power trip of having him want me. Now he wants me more than ever, and I don't want him. What is wrong with me?!

How do I start getting excited about him again? How do I spice up my Affair?

(I am housesitting for a couple a week and he is coming up tomorrow for the night ... I wish I was excited about this and didn't feel like it was tedious ... I'm just not in the mood anymore. Maybe its my new birthcontrol pills (I'm changing to a new kind next month) ... I don't know.)

Ideas? Advice? Relations? Thank you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 10:13pm
Hi derrygirl,

I'm not in a similar situation so I don't know what kind of advice I can give you. I sometimes don't feel sooo excited to see my MM, but that's because I can get too nervous about getting caught. I am almost always anticipating the next time I get to see him. R u in love with your OM? maybe you need some time to miss him, to see if this relationship with him is what you really want.???

It could be your hormones... just be patient, see what happens, and do whats best for you!

=)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Tue, 08-19-2003 - 9:39am
Thanks for the reply lexylew! Let's see if maybe I can shed some more light on this for myself with a reply.

My OM is a good buddy of my BF and my good buddy too. That's how the Affair started pretty much ... he fell for me, we flirted, then we did more ... etc. So I can't "get caught" with my OM unless we were caught in "the act" because I'm alone with him in and out of public often. So I don't really have that thrill.

I love my OM ... but I doubt if I am "in love" with him.

I had some time to miss him when he went to New England for two weeks. But instead of me growing fonder of him in his absence, it seems I grew less interested.

I'm hoping its hormones. It's not like I've been all that gung-ho for the bf either.

Thanks!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Tue, 08-19-2003 - 12:18pm
Well, our "big overnight date" is tonight (and wouldn't you know it, I broke out on my chin ... figures. Good thing he's a friend and not just a lover or I'd be really embarrassed ... well more embarrassed anyhow)! Anybody have any suggestions of things I could do or think of to get more excited?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 08-19-2003 - 2:03pm
Ya know, have you ever thought that maybe you're just tired of the situation in it's entirety, I know I sure the hell am! UGH today, DOUBLE UGH!

Liberal

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Tue, 08-19-2003 - 2:09pm
:) I know how you feel. Ugh! That's one major disadvantege to having an affair with a mutual friend that I really didn't think of ... breaking it off without crushing somebody.

But I wouldn't do that until after tonight anyhow. That'd just be mean. He's been looking forward to this for a week.

When I get tired of it all but still want to have fun with it I try to remember how I felt at the beginning. How exciting it was and what not.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Fri, 08-22-2003 - 12:50pm
Just wanted to give an update here.

My overnighter with the OM turned out great! Its amazing what champagne and a gift can do for a labido! Hahaha.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Sat, 08-23-2003 - 9:04am
Happy that your overnighter was great!

I can't wait to have another night with

my OM:) ~passion
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Sun, 08-24-2003 - 2:29pm
Overnighters with an OM are really a treat, aren't they? This is only the 3rd time we got to try it and first two times he was worried my bf would suddenly come home from up north and catch him that he could hardly sleep! This last time wasn't stressful at all. It was just real nice and cozy. Sleeping together is nice whether its sex or just sleep.

:)