Am I handling A wrong?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2010
Am I handling A wrong?
7
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 8:58am

I've posted here a time or two, been in an A for 2 and a half months, I am MW in mid-40's he is MM mid-40's.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2009
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 9:39am

IMHO, he's just being a typical guy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 11:44am

Hi Oldtimer, thanks for the response, I totally agree with much of what you said.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 12:13pm

I think you handled it perfectly.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2009
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 12:41pm

About 4 years ago I met a MM and we decided to have a relationship.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 1:46pm

Thanks for the response Janejosie, been lurking here for awhile now and you always seem to have a good handle on things.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 4:00pm

I think you did really well telling him what you need to be happier in the A, but then every time you backpedaled and said something like "but if that's not what you want, it's OK, it has a shelf life anyway". At least that's what I took you to mean when you said this:

"...then we continue and all of the intracacies will be worked out. I responded that and if they aren't that's ok too because this this does have a shelf life ."

Stick to your guns about what you need. An A is for fun, for friendship, and to add something to your life. If, instead, it makes you feel bad or used, then it isn't worth it, right? It sounds like he'll be reasonable and will try to please you, but don't let him treat you bad and think "well, it's just an A, it will expire anyway".

Anyway it's great that you spoke up! Be proud of yourself for that.

Proud to be a





You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice. ~Steven D. Woodhull

Proud to be a





You've

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2010
Fri, 07-23-2010 - 5:01pm

Thank you Clex, you are SO right, yes I backpeddled a lot and I do have a tendency to do that and I believe it is because of my insecurity combined with my fear of losing this A.