On and off with my AP

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2011
On and off with my AP
2
Sun, 10-28-2012 - 5:56pm

Ok my last update was that I wasn't sure about my AP. He has filed for divorce but once he did that he told me the wasn't ready for a relationship. But we continued to talk daily. Then he asks me over for sex and I decline, he gets mad, we fight and make up (no sex). Several people here cheered me for not giving in and not being a fallback girl so to speak. I realize he told me he wanted to be free because he wanted to be free to go out with some other prople. Who he told me about, nothing really came of these dates. SO now he is back to me. Invites me over again, I still am refusing mainly because I don't want just sex from him and he know this.We have been basically in a long term EA/ PA for 5 years now. And I was in agreement with him that he should not be tied down and he should see what he really wants to do. He was married for over 20 years and I am still in. . I'm just trying to back off while he goes through the divorce. Its should be final in a month or so. I want to be with him as a RL couple someday and I told him that. I was expecting that to scare him off but it hasn't . I do plan to get out of my M with or without AP, I keep thinking he will move on but he doesn't, what gives?  

Community Leader
Registered: 09-21-2007
Fri, 11-02-2012 - 3:10pm

I am not sure what really gives, but mixed signals for sure.  He wants you, but he wants to be single.  I would say, he wants his cake and eat it too.

 

Shadow Word generated at Pimp-My-Profile.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2011
Mon, 11-05-2012 - 7:37pm

Yes I would say he would love it have it both ways but I refuse to give in to his cake eating ways. Anyway I have let the cat out of the bag and told him what I want is a RL relationship. So even though I thought I should feel like I have boxed myself into a corner I don't feel that way. As a matter of fact I feel liberated that I told him the truth. And I thought that this revelation would run him away but it has not. So for now I am just taking that our relationship is what it is.