ANONYMOUS LETTER - WIFE KNOWS
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ANONYMOUS LETTER - WIFE KNOWS
| Sat, 02-21-2009 - 6:20pm |
In the past few weeks that AP has been trying to end it and I have been limping along with his decision, his wife received an anonymous letter at home giving her a heads-up that he is having an affair.

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My AP's wife found out about us almost
Thanks for the offer to chat.
Wow! Things are a little muddled aren't they? If it helps to know, I have been through all this. On these boards, people said that as soon as the wife finds out the MM will usually drop the AP like a hot potato. Now my MM did not do that to me, but before we got to where we are now, I went through listening to him saying he still loved her, that they still had sex, etc. Now call me weird for sticking around but it's all to do with a few things. One, i work with him too so no contact isn't as easy as it sounds. Two, over time it has become clear that their marriage isn't working and he isn't happy with her.
Now the problem I have and, by the sounds of it you have, is that the men seem to get their own way all too often. They do one thing, say another, suit themself basically. You have done exactly what i have done on numerous occasions and offered him a way out. It's way easier for me to say this now than it was a few years back but getting control is key. If he is worried about losing you and he should be the way he is treating you, give him something to be worried about. Try not to email or text. Back off slightly - if you feel you can coz I know people told me to do this and I just couldn't. If he sees a change in pattern though, trust me, he will worry and come running eventually.
I am sorry for you both. I am trying very hard to get past the emotional grip that a long
standing, off and on, PA went NC went EA with a narcissist, as well. He can never admit
he is ever wrong and would easily throw me under the bus because it is all about him.
Knowing this about him does make it somewhat easier, however, he can't seem to keep
his big nose out of my life (tracking my activities and whereabouts). Dude, you are M.
You better put all of that energy into your M with someone who I would assume cares
to be stalked.
Thanks, jig13 -
Unfortunately, I think at this point he could care less ... the farther away I stay, the better.
Friends, my hiney...apparently he sleeps with all of his friends, huh? Really, you don't
need to be controlled
And you know what?
0 to nil.
Now what are the chances that ANY relationship he will have will work out, and that he will actually commit to someone in a grown up way?
0 to nil, again.
It sounds like he's in a stage of experimentation and trying out different relationships - a very adolescent sort of mind set really. He may never grow out of it.
Some would say that I fell from grace... but I didn't.
You've got a lot of choices. I
Lexi is right. How did your AP "drag" you into it? You don't have to answer, but my XAP
waits until he thinks a woman is at her most vulnerable, then sweeps in. He must truly
hate his mother or something and takes no responsibility for his actions and blames
the world for his woes that he creates. Then he can't figure out why he has no friends.
Gee, I wonder what the problem is? Sorry, I am not much help other than pointing out
what you already know.
Hi Lexi,
I used to post a long time ago when you were a
http://able2know.org/topic/101932-1
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