Any Suggestions?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
Any Suggestions?
4
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 9:55am

I've been lurking for awhile and finally decided to post -


I've known my AP for over 20 years.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2007
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 10:10am

In general, second rounds of A's ( after you break up for the first time for any reason), can lead to two things.either you will break up soon again forever ,for any reason( guilt or unmet needs,discovery,etc) or it will go on and on for years ( if right things happen at right time, no games from either side)and even if you want to end it by choice,its a defeated battle.

His pulling away is usually after being physical.Thats so easy to find why.he got what he wanted! and will come back again when he wants more of you.The usual saying here is that they guilty after doing the deed.but where is the guilt when they get horny again and come to us??

i am not saying your AP is such but most likely it is so.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 1:57pm

I am sorry I have to do it again, I would be me if I didn't.

Now there are some ways to say things, and there are some things you just don't say. It's like a big girl who knows she shouldn't be wearing those tight a** shorts that show all her rolls, but she wears them anyway, and freaks other people out (I'm a big girl, so I can say that.) Man you were really hard on g/f. I mean I know we have to keep it real, but dag. She just finished saying how much her AP loves her, and about the time they spent together, and you blast her w/ he is just using you for sex. KNOWING that that is THE biggest fear that women here have. I mean that what makes us second guess everything, and over analyze everything because we want to make sure that we don't over invest emotionally more than our APs want, or need.

I guess for me it was like praising Allah in a Christian church. You just don't go there, at least not that way. Either your new to the game or you haven't played at all. I find it hard to believe that "someone who has been there" would reply so coldly. Just my opinion.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2008
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 4:53pm

Gosh, I am not sure I would be so quick to label her situation or her partner into a stereotype


My AP (and I only call him that for the sake of calling him something for the sake of this board)


have known each other for over 15 years. I am S he is M and we have a lot of things in common


from

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 9:59pm

At this point I think maybe I over-reacted to his "being busy this time"