You are correct dear. Please let me know if you need anything during this long hard road. The only thing keeping my D from being final is the fact that my STBX cannot come up with the money to pay me for the house.
It is ahrd but oh so worth it in the long run if the M was not saveable.
You are doing what I don't think I have the courage to do. I know that I'm not happy in my M and I know that even if H and I work things out to the way they used to be, it still won't be the love of my life, just ok. It kills me to know that all it's ever going to be is ok, but the reality of leaving him is what keeps me here on my bad days. Wishing you strength as you go through this tough process.
I am in the finance area that you are talking about email me off board and I can see what the deal is and at least steer you in the right direction or let you know if it is possible at all.
good luck u have described my situation to a T...went to the mediator this week with H and it all comes down to the economy/finances....i don't think i will have much to start over with but one good thing we have no minor children i know now is the time to do it.. and this summer i spent exactly the same way with a H who treats me like a possession and someone who wants to control me and i don't think he even likes me for me..fun loving etc...ugh...good luck!
I have been where you are and believe me, it just gets better and better. Don't be surprised if you have regrets or crying fits or wondering if you should go back. Find one good friend who can listen..that is essential.
My D is final..I think..just waiting for the signed papers in the mail from the judge. I saw XH today and had a surge of such relief..he has not changed at all, it is all about him as it ever was. Won't go into details but it has to do with finances too.
Ladies, you can always make more money. I ended up giving up on several thousand dollars to get out, but it was so worth it. My freedom is priceless.
I know just how you ladies feel I was all set to leave my wife and had even consented to turn over our home to her just so I could get away from our dead marriage. But, it all went into the pot when she was diagnosed with cancer and I was left to care for her for the next two years before she passed away. Since she had no living relatives other than our children, I felt obligated to care for her in spite of ten years of loveless cohabitation. I am now trying to cope with living my life as I see fit, rather than as others wish me to live it. It's actually very refreshing.
You are correct dear. Please let me know if you need anything during this long hard road. The only thing keeping my D from being final is the fact that my STBX cannot come up with the money to pay me for the house.
It is ahrd but oh so worth it in the long run if the M was not saveable.
That is where we are coming into a problem.
It took me a very long time, 4 yrs with AP to get to this point.
i know now is the time to do it..
and this summer i spent exactly the same way with a H who treats me like a possession and someone who wants to control me and i don't think he even likes me for me..fun loving etc...ugh...good luck!
Hi,
I have been where you are and believe me, it just gets better and better. Don't be surprised if you have regrets or crying fits or wondering if you should go back. Find one good friend who can listen..that is essential.
My D is final..I think..just waiting for the signed papers in the mail from the judge. I saw XH today and had a surge of such relief..he has not changed at all, it is all about him as it ever was. Won't go into details but it has to do with finances too.
Ladies, you can always make more money. I ended up giving up on several thousand dollars to get out, but it was so worth it. My freedom is priceless.
But, it all went into the pot when she was diagnosed with cancer and I was left to care for her for the next two years before she passed away. Since she had no living relatives other than our children, I felt obligated to care for her in spite of ten years of loveless cohabitation.
I am now trying to cope with living my life as I see fit, rather than as others wish me to live it.
It's actually very refreshing.
Thank you for your support, it's nice to hear someone who has made it out of a bad marriage and can say all the tears a worth it.