Attractive/not Attractive

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2012
Attractive/not Attractive
11
Sat, 11-03-2012 - 10:46am

I'm curious, are your APs more attractive than your SOs?  Is that what led you to them?  Are you attractive and your SO not as much?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2012
Sat, 11-03-2012 - 7:58pm

H is good looking but very white collar.  He's metro sexual.  AP is good looking but works with his hands.  He's constantly apologizing about how rough his hands are and can't fathom why I think that's among the sexy things about him.  He's also wonderful to talk to.  H is a snooze fest.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2012
Sat, 11-03-2012 - 11:10pm

Ha! How did a cowgirl ever wind up with a metro sexual? :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2012
Sun, 11-04-2012 - 12:47am

much more attractive. one of the many, many, reasons why i'm currently in the divorce process with my so is that he hates working out/refuses to take care of his health and both my AP and I are fitness freaks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sun, 11-04-2012 - 5:47pm

LOL about the snooze fest.  Do you think if your DH was more interesting you wouldn't have had the affair?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2010
Sun, 11-04-2012 - 9:38pm

In my opinion, my AP is better looking than my H. The AP's W is younger and prettier (at least from a photo from 3 yrs ago).

In no way was that the reason for either of us choosing each other for the A. More than anything, it was the emotional connection. I guess now that I think about it, the AP's emotional attractiveness is what drew me to him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2012
Sun, 11-04-2012 - 11:09pm

If my H hadn't told me he didn't love me or like me anymore and wanted a divorce, I don't believe I would have done more than fantasize about it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2012
Sun, 11-04-2012 - 11:14pm

My parents drilled it in my head that I needed to find a good boy that would provide a good, stable life.  H was the complete opposite of every guy I dated and exactly what they wanted me to marry.  They adore him.  I fully expect them to freak out when I move out and tell them.  My dad already blamed me for H wanting a D to begin with.  

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-10-2011
Mon, 11-05-2012 - 10:15am

H is okay looking.  AP to me is super sexy, tattoos, strong arms and he's very expressive.  H is not expressive AT ALL.  He is passive aggressive and I'm always having to guess wtf is wrong.  AP is a really good guy, he's a biker but he is just extremely protective, loving, and down to earth.  He's always held a steady job and has always taken care of his family.  Everything about him is attractive to me.

Community Leader
Registered: 09-21-2007
Wed, 11-07-2012 - 11:32am

I have compared the two of them, but I have never thought of one more attractive than the other.  They are both attractive, but different ways, especially since they are built different and way different personalities.  I do find AP extremely sexy though, because he is most my "type".  I was attracted to both instantly.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2012
Thu, 11-08-2012 - 12:26am

Lost,

That is interesting, because I feel similarly.  Mine are both attractive, in their own way. I will say that AP takes better care of his body (he's in shape), while H has let himself go. That is one of the turn offs for me with H.  He fluctuates. He'll get on a kick and drop lbs quickly, but he hasn't done that in a while. Since the birth of my last son, I've worked on my body and I look good now. And part of me feels it isn't fair that he doesn't do the same. Not for me, but for a healthy lifestyle. I value that, and apparently he doesn't.

My AP is quite a bit older than H. H is younger than me by three years, and AP is seven years older, so there is a ten year gap between the two of them. For me, it's like, why can't H look better? This guy is 10 years older and way more in shape.  Oh well. I

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