Back Again.....does it ever stop or end?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2009
Back Again.....does it ever stop or end?
5
Wed, 03-24-2010 - 3:45pm

So I’m back again, I’m so ashamed and can’t believe I am here again because I told myself it was over and even at one point believed it but apparently not because here I am.


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2000
Thu, 03-25-2010 - 2:32pm

Not a fool, just confused, it sounds like.

In answer to your question....it stops and ends when YOU stop and end it. It's really as simple as that. That doesn't mean it's easy. I, personally, believe that affairs are the same as any other addiction. Secret in nature, give you a rush, self-destructive, hard to get out of. So, like any addiction, you have to go through a process until you get to the point where you can no longer ignore the truth in front of your face. Then, and only then, will you take the steps necessary to recover. Until then, you live in a state of constant denial, telling yourself that it's ok, that's there's nothing wrong with it, that it makes you feel good, etc., etc., etc. Everybody's bottom is different. Maybe yours is over, and you won't go back, or maybe you'll see him again until you leave and suffer your bottom after that. I don't know. I only know that the bottom is inevitable, so it's up to you whether you want to do the work now to recover from this affair, or later.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2008
Fri, 03-26-2010 - 8:55am

It will end when you make it end. My A just ended after 1-1/2 years of working together, teasing flirting glances etc. No matter how many times we said it had to end it never did because we were together everyday at work so the chemistry was still there and couldn't be ignored.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2010
Tue, 03-30-2010 - 3:15pm

I don't think you are a fool but believe it or not you leaving the work place where you see AP is a blessing in disguise. I'm not saying that will make everything ok because even if you dont see him again you still have to heal what's inside of you. It is a step in letting him go though.


 


Much peace & Love,


Rayne


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
Tue, 03-30-2010 - 5:32pm

You're not a fool.


As for the "one more time" thing...

Proud to be a





You've

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2010
Tue, 03-30-2010 - 7:46pm
Edited by me.


Edited 3/31/2010 11:18 am ET by cove70