Bah Humbug Rant

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Bah Humbug Rant
89
Tue, 12-16-2008 - 1:52am




Dear AP's Wife -


Please keep your husband reined in and fix whatever his problem is. If you knew about me, you would be devestated. I do know about you, although I would prefer not to know as much as I do. Something is apparently wrong with your marriage that you are completely oblivious to and your husband has chosen to make my life an emotional hell. The irony being, I would like to be with him and I know about you, and it is unjust to both of us. He is too afraid of hurting you or leaving you, but it is apparenlty OK for him

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
Tue, 12-23-2008 - 10:40am

girl heck no i never wacked out to him about her never...many reasons...1. cause i don't know her..she could be very beautiful outside and in, 2. because i know where my bread is buttered and how good he treats me..any wacking out about her may turn him off to me and 3. because if he talks bad about her and i wack out about her to him, what would he say about me to anyone else and what would he think about me.....feel me....


it's not her fault at all..she doesn't even know ....

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
Tue, 12-23-2008 - 10:43am
well i don't jump through hoops, i do give him time when he asks..but because all the time scheduling for us to be together is up to him...it's easy for me though..i'm single my son is half grown..my girls have guys/men they deal with and spend time with them..and he pretty much knows me and my friend/girlfriends that is, schedule...so he texts, calls and spends time with me between them..he also hang out with us sometimes....he has a good time with us...there's rarely drama...he feels good when he's with me and i guess that's what excites me about it..making someone other than my son feel good....i like doing that...there's a lot of reasons i'm in this..but numero uno being, i love him to pieces

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-18-2004
Tue, 12-23-2008 - 10:56am

Interesting

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-18-2004
Tue, 12-23-2008 - 11:29am

You know what?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
Tue, 12-23-2008 - 1:23pm

Well, from reading both your posts, it is now obvious to me. "We can't teach an old dog new tricks". Your stuck in what you think is right and we're NOT professionals who gets paid big buck for enlightening people like you. So, my time is precious and this is wasting my time. I'll go teach my puppies some other tricks, at least they're more perceptive.

I would suggest though that you re-read your post and from the way you've been contradicting and justifying yourself, maybe you'll learn something from it. Or take this discussion to the "All Sides" board.



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"People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within."


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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2000
Tue, 12-23-2008 - 3:16pm

I agree that sending flowers and a catty note like that is just plain mean. I think you're missing the boat. I certainly understand feeling p*ssed off at AP and feeling like "sh*t or get off the pot, dude". Certainly I do. But what you are not seeming to get is that it is just plain cruel to do something to make ourselves feel good that hurts another person. Translation....it made you feel damn good to do a dirty deed. It made you feel like you had one-upped him. It made you feel a sense of retaliation and revenge. But you hurt an innocent person in doing so....the SO. Why do that to her? What did she do to you? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. You mentioned that you have been on the receiving end of cheating. Imagine if it were you that it was done to. Try putting yourself in the other person's shoes. C'mon, you're not a stupid woman. You have to know that this was a very hurtful and ugly thing to do to that woman. All to make you feel good. Was it REALLY worth it? Because, honestly, if you had no guilt feelings, if you had no remorse for hurting another person, then you know what that implies? That you're a sociopath. Because sociopaths fall exactly under that category.

Maybe you're exhibiting this bravado just to ruffle some feathers and for a kick, but deep inside you don't really feel that way. For your sake...actually for your soul's sake, I hope so. Because if not...oh, dear...really, I think you have some hard issues to face.

My suggestion for you is to just extricate yourself completely from this situation. And stay away from married men. Because it obviously doesn't make you happy. Happy people don't feel the way you do, and happy people sure don't do what you did to your past AP. They just don't. Getting out of the situation and never getting in it again results in.....guess what...problem solved. No married man to b*tch about. No married man's wife to b*tch about. None of it. Freedom. Let it ring, man. Let it ring. Stay away from married men and you never have to feel this way again. It is as simple as that.
New Years is coming up. Make that your resolution and stick to it. No MM=No MM problems. The choice is all yours. So....sh*t or get off the pot, dude.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Tue, 12-23-2008 - 8:30pm




I hear a lot of bitterness coming from some folks. Everyone on this board is an A or was, or


something that they feel would resemble an A. You are right. Stay away from MM and men


should stay away from MW for the same reason. It is destructive and I suppose the point


to the flowers to the BS was my way of finally putting an end to something that there was


no end to. It was an

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Tue, 12-23-2008 - 9:19pm

I am totally unclear what you are looking for here.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Wed, 12-24-2008 - 1:27am




I needed to get my feelings out about my A and taking my power back. I don't believe


there were any questions in the post requiring an answer.


But I will ask a question. Your photo shows you with I would assume is you SO or H. Are you

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2005
Wed, 12-24-2008 - 1:41am

Wow, where's the emoticon for OMG, what happened?!

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