b/c i crave contact communication &

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2003
b/c i crave contact communication &
3
Fri, 10-17-2003 - 8:51am
reassurance,i find that when i don't hear from om for a while i get unreasonably panicked.i'm always shocked by a phone call or an email(btw...i hate talking to him on the phone...we need to look at eachother when we talk.)i find that i am often contacting him.he responds & doesn't complain,for all i know he may even like it.last night when i never got a response to my apology about saying hurtful things.(not unusual)..i emailed this morning & asked for one,b/c i said i love that stuff & then went on to tell him news about my latest project.small talk.the thing is...having been brought up w/ the female role of "it's best to play hard to get" i sometimes feel like i'm being annoying.that's my OWN hangup.i really think it's my contact that keeps us connected.he's not really a deep communicator on the surface.i seem to be introducing him to that world. .my question is...does anyone else feel this way at times?like they're trying too hard..or they love too much,or that their world is colored by this contact & they are mostly the ones initiating it?
Avatar for mikkolover
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Fri, 10-17-2003 - 9:55am
I feel like that all the time. I have been talking with OM for 7 weeks now, he is in the netherlands, i am in finland, technically he is my H step-bro, but we all met a few years ago, and in aug at a wedding, clicked.. in the beginning 3 weeks it was all him text messaging me, emails etc.. but now.. wow, nothing. last week i sent him some i am very hurt and sick of this crap messages.. and he phoned and talked and said he didn't want to end it etc.. and that he still misses me etc...

then this whole week, nothing.. sometimes its not worth it at all

Avatar for jennlynnk
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Fri, 10-17-2003 - 10:59am
Well, i understand. MM and i live two minutes apart, talk all day long, and see each other jsut about every day. But there are times when i feel like he COULD have called me but didn't, COULD HAVE emailed me but didn't. Or sometimes i get to thinking i am initiating too much (even though he really is the one who contacts me)..Which is ridiculous!! My point is.... no one could have more communication w/ their MM than me, and i still feel that way once in awhile. If he doesn't hear from me for a few hours though, my cell's a ringing. And if i don't answer, the message goes "hey! you always pick up your phone! what's going on?? Are you okay over there??" LOL i even know his messages. My point is, no amount of communication eliminates those feelings altogether, and i believe we'd probably have these worries/insecurities even if i was dating a single guy.

good luck! hang in!

jenny

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2003
Fri, 10-17-2003 - 1:46pm
actually...a message just came up on my cell that must have come thru from last last night.he was hoping i was up b/c he wanted to talk & blah blah blah...of course i was elated that he was thinking of me...but then i turned it into a moment of panick thinking...he's calling cause he wants to break it off.wow...i've got to give myself a break!it's like being a teenager again.i'm beginning to realize why the way i love my h is so comfortable.no panick.