Big vent! advice please.
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Big vent! advice please.
| Thu, 04-23-2009 - 11:48am |
Hi Everyone,
Well quick backround. I am away on extended vacation. Met single guy who came onto me, seemed really nice, like I finally found guy who was REAL and tells how it is, no games, no dishonesty. We chat online. he comes over twice. We only kiss although he says he'd like more. I tell him how I feel, that I am attracted and the scoop on my marriage and that I dont just jump into bed with anyone. We have a great time talking/flirting while he was here. Two nights ago, he was here. He walked in kisses me on the cheek, gives big hug. When he leaves we kiss several nice kisses. I ask if he is off next day and he tells me he is fishing but not working. I ask if he wanted to get together/hang out as he knows H comes in today (this would have been yesterday we would have hung out).He says ok. I hear nothing. No email, no IM, he doesn't even sign on. Nothing again today. I wrote him last night asking how his day was and such and told him if he gets home by a certain time to call if he wants to come over. Nothing. I obviously feel like he is avoiding me all of a sudden and have no idea why. It is really bothering me! He seemed fine when he left. What could have happened between then and now? He was online plenty before this. I almost feel like he is blocking me on Im although my emails go through. I am more upset that he couldn't at least communicate to me whats up. I thought he was different. he seemed the type to say exactly how he feels. I want to email him one last time to tell him I feel bad that I could have offended him or something and that I wish he could have had some consideration and told me what the problem is.Is that too much to ask? He's 33, he isn't young. Anyone have any idea or advice? I know you dont know the guy but I never put pressure on him or made him feel uncomfortable and he seemed fine with coming over. He was the one who came onto me! Could he all of a sudden decide he doesn't want to see or even talk to me? What really upsets me most is the not knowing. Im not involved with him enough to be upset at him changing his mind. It's the inconsideration and probably the feeling of being ditched that hurts when he cannot even have the balls to tell me. It just sucks that he cannot just be adult here and tell me. I hate the not knowing and I don't believe he's too busy. He works nights mostly.
Well quick backround. I am away on extended vacation. Met single guy who came onto me, seemed really nice, like I finally found guy who was REAL and tells how it is, no games, no dishonesty. We chat online. he comes over twice. We only kiss although he says he'd like more. I tell him how I feel, that I am attracted and the scoop on my marriage and that I dont just jump into bed with anyone. We have a great time talking/flirting while he was here. Two nights ago, he was here. He walked in kisses me on the cheek, gives big hug. When he leaves we kiss several nice kisses. I ask if he is off next day and he tells me he is fishing but not working. I ask if he wanted to get together/hang out as he knows H comes in today (this would have been yesterday we would have hung out).He says ok. I hear nothing. No email, no IM, he doesn't even sign on. Nothing again today. I wrote him last night asking how his day was and such and told him if he gets home by a certain time to call if he wants to come over. Nothing. I obviously feel like he is avoiding me all of a sudden and have no idea why. It is really bothering me! He seemed fine when he left. What could have happened between then and now? He was online plenty before this. I almost feel like he is blocking me on Im although my emails go through. I am more upset that he couldn't at least communicate to me whats up. I thought he was different. he seemed the type to say exactly how he feels. I want to email him one last time to tell him I feel bad that I could have offended him or something and that I wish he could have had some consideration and told me what the problem is.Is that too much to ask? He's 33, he isn't young. Anyone have any idea or advice? I know you dont know the guy but I never put pressure on him or made him feel uncomfortable and he seemed fine with coming over. He was the one who came onto me! Could he all of a sudden decide he doesn't want to see or even talk to me? What really upsets me most is the not knowing. Im not involved with him enough to be upset at him changing his mind. It's the inconsideration and probably the feeling of being ditched that hurts when he cannot even have the balls to tell me. It just sucks that he cannot just be adult here and tell me. I hate the not knowing and I don't believe he's too busy. He works nights mostly.

I think you *do* know.
I think one of two things, either he is having second thoughts or he met someone else and moved on because he knew your H was going to be arriving.
Thanks for advice, very much appreciated.
You've already written him...what...twice with no response?
Thank you for sharing and giving me good advice. I really do appreciate it.
Thank you and you're welcome :)
Did your therapist ever delve into the relationship you had with your father?
Hi, no real advice for your situation but I hope you won't mind if I pass on