"Bot a ticket "...back on roller coaster
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"Bot a ticket "...back on roller coaster
| Mon, 05-17-2004 - 10:17am |
MM emailed me first thing this morning. Told me he noticed me at the school play and was trying to get my attention.
So, here we go again... today's emails are the way they were 2 months ago.... I think I have figured this whole thing out. The light bulb has come on REAL bright.
Although, I am happy with him knowing I am sick, and he knows how I feel that he has not run away. That must be a good sign? Huh?
Happy and calm for now....

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I also asked him, if he is sure of us and wants me to stay I will. This was before I decided to move back into my old house with H. All I got was, "you have to do what is best for you". He seemed not so sure of it all himself. That's why I got the feeling he wan't in it for real. He didn't make any concessions on his side like many other men on this board did - like for example Rain/Boston, to make me feel comfortable with my situation. Nothing very helpful or accomodating. It was always a nonchalant answer of "whatevers suit you". I meant ask him, "what suits you buddy, weren't you in it all along"??? Why the sudden volte face?? Maybe he felt we weren't really meant to be in a real realtionship?? I don't know, too many actions on his part not just the ones that are mentioned here made me realize it will never work out between us.
Anyway, that was a while back, things have worsened between us now. I am trying to get out of this mess once and for all, so that I don't have to shed ONE MORE of my preciuos tears on him.
I hope your case is not so bad as mine. If it is, please realise he will never ever leave his wife. He is just shifting the blame on you. My 2 cents.
Sorry for going off the subject. I just needed to post this out there, very theraputic. I have no one else to confide in right now. This board is all I have, so bear with me if I boring you with my details.
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