Broke up with bf.....but funnily enough.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2003
Broke up with bf.....but funnily enough.
2
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 7:10am
I just ended my almost 4-years-old engagement.And no it was not for the A. There was no sex drive, no chemistry and no matter how much we tried, we just wouldnt click again. Of course, the feeling of guilt is driving me nuts as I am the one who initiated the breakup.It had nothing to do with MM.He only made me realize that I have more opportunities out there, that might work out better for me and Im still only 21!

The funny thing is, now that Im single again, Im starting to enjoy my freedom rush tremendously.I want to be out there independant, single,free to do what I want! MM is of course very bothered.He thinks now that Im single I might choose to voluntarily leave him for someone else.I couldnt do that before because I was stuck in my engagement anyway. And I love MM, so much. He always said though that our relation has its limitations and that he will never leave his wife and kid for me. So I come to think now, what do I want in life? Do I want to remain with MM, killing every opportunity to be in a 'real' relationship again? Or do I finally enjoy my freedom, now since I have it? Thank you for letting me vent!
Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 8:31am
dream

Enjoy your freedom! When I was 20 I ended an engagement and never felt guilty about it. I dated a guy totally opposite of my bf for a year, he was a dud. So he made my bf look good, that coupled with the fact that bf kept in touch during that year made me decide to marry bf. I had second thoughts again but didn't act on them because I was afraid of looking bad and feely bad since I had broken it off once before. SO here I almost 21 years later having an A and feeling like "gee if only i had listened to my lttle voice" Don't get involved with only one person right now. Follow those feelings of wanting to be free

dd

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 5:10pm
DD,

you have answered all my confused questions :)! I was just thinking, what if I dont find anyone as good as my bf? (He's a great guy, just no chemistry), should we get back together and marry then?OR should I still give it a try with other people out there? But obviously, if the chemistry has not been there for the past couple of years, I highly doubt it would click again. The question is, and I know I must sound extremly selfish, but since Im single again, I dont see why I cant have a normal relation and not an A any more.I love MM, but we know it's ending nowhere!