Cancer diagnosis -changes everything

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2008
Cancer diagnosis -changes everything
27
Fri, 05-15-2009 - 11:39pm

Sorry in advance for such a long post.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Sun, 05-17-2009 - 10:23pm

You sent him a gift after he screamed at you and made you feel like crap?


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2008
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 5:29am

I know, Clarity, sounds crazy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2008
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 10:24am

You have landed yourself a very difficult guy!

No advice.

Take care.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 11:57am

Good morning,


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2009
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 1:17pm

inturmoil,


Been following your posts over the weekend and I was compelled to respond after this one.


Your AP sounds unfortunately very similar to someone I dated after my divorce. One month totally attentive and all over me. The next month he started acting very strangely and more it went on, the more bizarre it got. He was a master emotional manipulator.. (a lawyer no less) who could effectively turn anything he did wrong to his advantage.


I'm sorry but being a stalker does not equal love, imo.


Your AP knew you were married when the two of you decided to begin a relationship. So why is he telling you now that you need to prove anything to him? Just so you can keep the prize?


Please go to your library or Amazon.com and get the following book. It is very enlightening:


In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People.


Once I realized what the man I was dating was all about, I was able to effectively hold my own in conversations and I ended the R. very quickly. He wasn't worth the high blood pressure he was causing.


Don't hold to anger, hurt or pain. They steal your energy and keep you from love.       ~Anonymous
 &nb

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 1:43pm

theeternal, you have put it soo well.If only all A's were like that-- feeling of contentment.

You are one lucky gal.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2008
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 10:56pm
Thank you so much! I just feel (when he apologizes) I fall for him all over again. How do I focus on the negative? Now, he is back to normal and calling and telling me how much he loves me and how we are soul mates... I have to focus on the negative.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Mon, 05-18-2009 - 11:26pm

Right now, he is being


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2008
Tue, 05-19-2009 - 9:19am

So, Clarity,

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Tue, 05-19-2009 - 12:33pm
This guy is toxic,sorry,dont have a better word.IMO, he is playing with your emotions like a soft ball.I cant imagine going thru so much emotional instability,that too with kids.One can only take so much.He doesnt love you,IMO.He wants to win you as a trophy and doesnt sound like that even if he wins,he will be able to treasure it,KWIM?
It sounds more like emotional abuse than an emotional connection( or A).This guy knows that you love him dearly , so he is pushing your buttons again and again.
You need to cut him off from your life.