Can't believe this is really happening..
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| Mon, 09-07-2009 - 3:39pm |
Man I need some support here. Thought my story was different. Thought the turnout would be different and now I'm not so sure anymore. I am having a meltdown like I've never had before.
AP and I have huge many years history behind us. Unhappy in lousy marriages. Now seeing each other for some time. After both seperations in the works, already been through D day, everything going WONDERFUL for us, sorta fast but...seeing each other whenever possible, plans for future, children, within a beaming and beautiful relationship. Suddenly after another great visit, something seemed different when I didnt hear from him right away. Not usual contact times.
Today, things are suddenly different.
I'm frightened out of my mind because, well, we could be PG. He is aware of the possibility and up to this point, we've both been nervous, but super excited. Now today he's not ready for it anymore. WTF??
Sooo...if I'm not, why do I have this horrid feeling like things are over between us and he'll go back to his marriage?
I'm really losing my mind here. Have no one to talk to and feeling pretty alone right now. He was my rock and I'm preparing myself for the worst. OMG. This cant be happening.
Edited 9/7/2009 3:58 pm ET by oneshortlife

In addition...I wish I could say that its just hormones or something messing with my head today, but the proof is in the pudding: you can't deny when you're told that perhaps we should take a breather.
What do I do when I don't feel that same way? I'm PRETENDING TO, I want to be supportive of his feelings, but DAMN what about me? I thought everything was ok. I'm freaking out because I could potentially be left holding the bag. This was all SO sudden that I'm really in shock - sorta just want to turn off my phone and tell him to eat it (put nicely).
I really have some defensive mechanisms going on, and I believe rightfully so. Dont you?
Hello,
I'm so sorry you are hurting right now. I
So, everything was fine, you were both headed towards a life together, and then you think you might be pregnant, and he wants a "breather"? I'm not sure if I got the details right, but is that what the situation is?
I do know that even men in marriages get pretty anxious when a baby is on the way - even if the baby was planned, somehow, the reality of it scares the devil out of them. Men feel more "responsible" for providing for a baby - and thinking about the many years involved in raising it. I would give him the benefit of the doubt and give him a little time to adjust to the possibility.
You do have to start thinking about what YOU want and the many scenarios that could happen. Can you raise a child alone (with financial support from him - whether he wants to give it or not - he will have to give it, by law). Do you want this child? If there is a child!
Maybe the first thing you should do is calm down until you know for sure. Don't panic. Take it an hour at a time until you know what you're dealing with.
You've got a lot of choices. I