Can't wait around for nothing anymore..

Avatar for mikkolover
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Can't wait around for nothing anymore..
1
Mon, 09-22-2003 - 8:38am
I feel great today.. friday had some nice text message play with OM,and sat just two msgs after i wrote him, and sunday nothing. I desperately wanted to write all day, but told myself that it just wasn't worth it. I told him and try to believe it myeself, it takes two to tango.. so last night a quick one before bed.. ( kinda disappointed in myself), had great sex with Dh, and then this morn before my lesson, got a msg about him being sick, no hugs, or miss you whatever , so i wrote simply to take some honey water..

skip to after lesson.. 12oo msg ( what is honey water....) no hugs, love ,miss you etc.. whatever again.. wrote i was too busy today to email and not sure if he read the 3 i sent last thursday still but it didn't matter cause i was too busy today to write...

so at 2:30, get a message, what do you mean, not anymore?? told him i was busy and will fit him in where he fits me in, simple. he responded more positive, with try to be on msn later. i came back with, you wanna pick a time so we don't miss eachother.. and nothing... no problem. i also said i had seen the light and if it was meant to happen it will, so we shall see... no games, just me taking control of my own thoughts and feelings, for maybe the first time EVER!!! thanks for listening..

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Mon, 09-22-2003 - 10:08am
I'm with you, mikkolover! It does get so old, always giving and wondering why they aren't giving back. SO frustrating. It's time for us to put other things first and if they want to get in touch with us, they will. I don't know about you, but when I do that I get such a rush...a feeling that *I* am in control. And there's nothing like that feeling. It may mean I don't get to talk to him as often as I would have, but I'm not going to call him every fifteen minutes and try to catch him at his desk. I know good and well even as I'm lifting that receiver and punching in that number that he's not going to be there. He'll be off shooting the breeze with someone else...always is. (How is it someone can get paid a salary just to stand around talking crap all day?) In the beginning of this, he called all the time, always made time for me, but now... Now I'm being shoved down toward the bottom of his priority list, somewhere around where his wife spends every day of her sad life. How nice it would be to have someone who e-mailed me on a regular basis, or called me just to let me know he was thinking about me and missed me. H doesn't even do that.