Change of Behavior

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2004
Change of Behavior
24
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 8:22pm
I read an article today on the bus ride home- it discusses behavioral changes as they relate to relationships in general. When one person changes behavior it will be interpretated numerous different ways. I won't go into everything, but I thought about manu of us here. Seems we women come to the men moreso than the men to the women. For example- me. I would usually be the one that would saunter over to my MM at our kids' game. This past weekend- I did not at all. So I changed my behavior. Anyhow, the author notes that we never know how this change is viewed in the other's eyes.

My question/comment would be: if we changed our behavior would this make any difference in the overall scheme of things? Again, my example- does my MM wonder why I did not approach him this weekend?

Just curious on thoughts... there were other comments on this topic as well, but it's too much to go into.

v.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
In reply to: vles64
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 8:26pm
I wanted to say the same thing. I guess they have been around the block a lot what say to entrap us foolish women.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2004
In reply to: vles64
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 8:31pm
i tell my children that when you lie to someone you are assuming they are foolish enuf to believe to you. so i guess i should take my own motherly advice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
In reply to: vles64
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 8:39pm
lol saag! Good One!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2004
In reply to: vles64
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 11:36am
I did not realize I was comming across as aggressive.

I was being careful not to assert myself in becomming

a "nuisence" in e-mailing my mm to often.

I also do not believe that one person should have the

"power" over another. We understand and encourage

each others aspirations, and challenge each other to

grow in a positive manner.


We are both very ambitious for position of power in our

respective jobs, maybe that is why we are drawn

to each other, to help each other seek our goals.

We work very well in our respective jobs and it seems

to coordinate on our joint efforts also on a personal level.



Manipulation, I agree is very dangerous. I do not

expect someone to practice it with me, nor I with them.

We do not have a clingy, smothering relationship. We respect

each others freedom, and encourage each other emotionally.

I believe my "bait" as you call it, he see's as my being

confident in myself and again not smothering.

We also do not coerce the other person to accept our views.

we respect each others views, may not always agree, but then

who always agree's with each other.

We are both able to give and receive affection, tenderness

and appreciation in our relationship.

Thank you for your comments

Bunny

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