charlotte...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
charlotte...
3
Fri, 01-09-2004 - 1:32pm
I was wonderng how you have been holding up today? Still in the denial stage?? Please post if you have time.


Edited 1/9/2004 1:33:13 PM ET by learning_french
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2003
Fri, 01-09-2004 - 3:09pm
french

Thank you so much for asking. I think so. I don't know, like I said the other day, I have wondered if things between us would move to a new level (I mean emotionally, of course) and now that they are, I'm scared stiff. I didn't expect that. I'm happy at the same time, confused, etc.!!

My big thing is I am afriad that I am going to get attached to him and feel like I need him, and then somehow loose him. Fear of the unknown, ya know? I can't define or get a grip on exactly what "this" is. If that makes sense. It's scary.

So your MM "tested the waters"? Tell me more about your situation if you don't mind. Maybe reading about you will help me figure out what the hell I am doing!!

I'll be off the board, but will check back. Thanks again for asking!!!

Charlotte

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 01-09-2004 - 3:30pm
Charlotte, mine is a little complicated story to say the least. LOL Lets just say my A did not start off in the right footing - partly my fault and partly MM's fault. And to make things worse we did not communicate with each other well for long because we were mostly avoiding the A than trying to get into it. I guess we both looking for something more than the extra in the EMA. Not the perfect way to start of an A - but then I didn't have the wonderful advice of people here on the board until early last year. Our hearts came first and it was a mess. So when we were on the same page - more or less - it still wasn't full force emotional. We had put these barriers around us that we wouldn't let other person hear our innermost feelings - so were were testing waters - throwing in a sentence here and there so that they wouldn't get hurt if the other person did not want to take it to the next level emotionally. Now MM is very open and trusts me a lot than before but it got us a while to get there and there was a lot of pain on both sides. That's why I wouldn't ever want to do it again, EVER. Not even for a zillion bucks. :)


Edited 1/9/2004 3:33:12 PM ET by learning_french
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-27-2003
Sat, 01-10-2004 - 10:38am
"We had put these barriers around us that we wouldn't let other person hear our innermost feelings." -- I know that's what I am doing!!! Thanks so much french...how long has your A been going on?

Charlotte