Christmas gift question

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Christmas gift question
5
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 9:45am
I know this has been discussed on here, but I'm not sure if this particular part of it has. First a history. Last summer right before MM's bday he was saying he wanted to buy me something for my office. Something that would make me think of him every time I looked at it. So his bday was coming up, and keeping that in mind, I bought him something for his desk for that very reason. Then a couple of months later came my bday and he bought me something for my office. It was a HUGE ordeal... Just getting it to my office without being seen was a drama all its own. Then he told me when I opened it how hard a time he had sneaking off to buy it. His W works nearby and they ride in together every day and, unlike me, he doesn't have his own bank account, so his wife would know every dollar he spent. I appreciated it all the more because of that. But now Christmas is here and I'm not sure... I bought him something, but I don't know if he's going to buy me anything. Christmas isn't the same as a birthday. So my question is, we're working next week and a couple of days the next and that's it. I could hint that I have something for him but I don't want him to feel obligated to buy something. So should I hold the gift until the last day we work and see if he gives me something or should I just go ahead and give it to him the day of our office Christmas party, which is a couple of days before? If I do it too early, he'd feel obligated to rush around and find something for me and if he's going to do it that way, I don't want it. What if HE bought ME something and he's holding it to see if I give him something, then we're both disappointed? I know, I'm probably overthinking this, but I overthink everything!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2003
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 9:50am

Give him what you got him, and understand the difficulty he has in getting you something. Don't expect anything from him. That way, if you don't get something, you won't be disappointed, if you do, you'll be pleasantly surprised.


JMHO

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 9:57am
Yeah, I know that's what I should do, but should I wait until the last possible day? I just don't want him to feel the stress of having to run around and get something for me, which is probably what he'd do if I gave it to him a couple of days before we stop seeing each other.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2003
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 10:04am
I have 2 suggestions. First if you really want him to have the gift give it to him and explain that you really wanted to give it to him but you don't want anything in return. Tell him you know how hard it is and him just being the great guy he is will be a gift in it self. Or you can do like me and keep the gift until he gives you a gift. My MM would not have difficulty buying me a gift so I don't want to embarrass him and give him a gift if he doesn't have one for me. But he did ask me my shoe size a week ago so I'm hoping for the Steve Madden boots that I saw in Cosmo that I LOVED!!!!!! Good Luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2003
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 1:48pm
thought I'd sare this about Chritmas gifts...

Ever year about this time I prepare some special Chirstmas treats cookies, brownies, cakes, candy and fudge to share with co workers. I always send a box to MM's work for him to share. This year he has a new boss that I have never met(I've met most of his coworkers). MM said that after he shared with his boss, his boss told him, You have to get Married to this woman!! Later his boss said your "just frineds with her" I never had a friend that would cook like that for me. You must be doing something right ;)

dayz
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 4:03pm
Kinda along this line... Did anyone see "Love Actually?" There's a whole scene in that movie about a man trying to buy a gift for a woman he's thinking about having an affair with. I have to say, that whole storyline made me feel a whole lot sick about buying a gift. I tried not to think about it when I was buying MM's gift. (It helped that I talked to him on my cellphone all the way there...) The movie kinda personified the whole yuckiness of an affair in just a couple of scenes without even showing the affair at all.