Confused, need advice
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| Mon, 02-16-2004 - 8:11pm |
Anyway - I was away for the weekend with my family. We had a great talk on Sat AM before I left (everything seemed fine) I ran into a friend of his over the weekend, so I called his cell yesterday to tell him (expecting on a Sun night to get his vm) about running into his buddy. As I'm leaving him a vm - he calls me right back. Told me he was over at a family members house w/his W and kids..he had gone outside to call me back. So, I guess I find this - a good sign. As I tell him who I saw, he asks me if I took him outside and was intimate with him. "Huh?" I say - no, I was with my H. so, he says back to me - "oh, if you were alone you would have?" "You are a nympo anyway..." I again, say "Huh?" He says..well, I get you once or twice a week and I'm sure your H does too. I was a bit taken back by this comment..but, moved the convo along.
So...I tell him I bought a short mini-shirt during the weekend. Thinking he's going to be excited to see me in this.. He then says.."you really are a tramp" WHOW. I was so taken back by this. I think out of not really sure what to say (a defense mechanism?) I just changed the subject. We chit chatted for a few minutes and he asks if we are getting together this week. Sounds good I say..and we ended the convo. I have not heard from him today, but it doesn't surprise me because it is a holiday and I'm sure his W is off work too.
I'm very confused, once in awhile, he'll be cranky (aren't all men) but, he's never spoken to me this way - I am so hurt by his words yesterday. Not sure what to do? or how to take this all? Maybe he was just joking and I'm overeacting..but, I've cried a river of tears for a day now. What should I do??

That stung. And, he knows well and good, not true.
Yikes..how could I forget that? Am I overeacting? Quite possibly. But, should I let it go and move on or say something to him?
regardless of whether or not he was in a bad mood or just playing around.. he should not have said that. We may not come first in their lives but there is still such a thing as kindness and respect. If it was me I would tell him point blank that he hurt my feelings and give him a chance to apologize, if he doesnt then I would rethink my relationship with him....this is just my opinion. As much as I love my MM I could not and would not tolerate being treated like that
hope it all works out for you
SB
Seeburg
Anyway - how can a EMA be built on trust? Funny, I just don't see any trust in a relationship where we both are hiding, lieing etc. I've always wondered if we got together someday in a "real" realationship, would we trust each other?
But for the man to talk to you the way he did? That was just downright rude and disrespectful. I would probably have burst out into tears after him talking like that to me. I can't imagine MM ever saying anything so NASTY to me!!
I think you've got to nip this one in the bud, be cool next time you talk to him and see if he apologizes. You don't need to be treated like that, what have you done to deserve that!!
I think he owes you an apology, BIG TIME!! And I would probably not see him again unless he offers a sincere one. JMHO.
Dusty
Now, I'm a MW who's been involved with a MM for almost 5 years. And I don't know how, but this relationship is definitely based on trust. I trust him with my life, my money, my secrets,...everything. And oddly enough, my marriage is based on trust (however misplaced that trust may be)-- if my H didn't trust me, I wouldn't be able to continue the EMA without being caught.
Relationships change over time. Passion fades, and it's replaced with something alot more comfortable and less intense. But some of us thrive on intensity.