Could use some advice

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2003
Could use some advice
3
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 1:55pm
I have been happily married for 10 years. I work full-time and have met a lot of great friends at my job. For almost 3 years I have been friends with a male coworker. He's helped me through some tough times at work and we've grown familar with other.

Last year this coworker showed me some of his artistic works which he does on the side as a hobby. He is a very talented sketch artist and some watercolor painting. He was happy to see my interest in his hobby and offered to sketch me. I agreed and over the past year he has sketched and worked on a couple paintings of me as time has permitted.

The recent sketches and paintings have been nude or partially nude. I have not told my husband about this. In the past few months things have progressed and has involved some touching.

I guess the first question is.. Am I already cheating? Part of me feels guilty while a whole other part of me can't wait for the next time with him.

I don't feel I can just step away from this either (maybe I am addicted to it!). Has anyone been through a similar situation. What should I do???

Thanks.

Candy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 2:19pm
hi candy first welcome we have very special ladies they help me so much. l think you are cheating candy if doing something that you don't want your H to know about or see yes to me that cheating.you also said you having touching also cheating.lm single oone here and mm is married and what done l don't his w to see . please come post anytime hugs kimmy
kimmy
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 08-18-2003 - 2:20pm
I think that you are the only one who can determine if you are cheating but the basis of cheating is lying and since you havent told your husband about your new favorite past time I would say yes, you are cheating, but thats just my opinion. Depending on the level of touching perhaps you are only emotionally cheating at this point. Just be sure you are heading in a direction that you are comfortable with because it's much easier going down the road than coming back...welcome to the board.

Liberal

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2003
Tue, 08-19-2003 - 11:37am
Thanks for the advice. Personally I feel like I am already cheating even though we haven't had intercourse. But my heart tells me to keep doing this with OM while my mind says "are you nuts?". I guess I am not alone in having these conflicting feelings though.