Dday for AP n he gets cash n prizes!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2007
Dday for AP n he gets cash n prizes!
5
Tue, 04-13-2010 - 8:42pm

My ap had a d day a while back. of course he started getting distant right away, his wife however started showering him with all kinds of expensive gifts, trips and such.


WTF? Does this make sense to anyone?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
Tue, 04-13-2010 - 9:37pm

I haven't heard of that being common with a D-day, but who knows what his wife is thinking? Maybe that the gifts etc. will show him how much she cares? The trips could be for the two of them to get away and start fresh? Everyone handles a discovery differently. In their heads they might know what they're trying to accomplish but we can't really second guess anyone.

How are YOU doing with everything Libby? Are you OK?

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You've

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2003
Tue, 04-13-2010 - 10:17pm
Maybe the wife just thinks she can buy his affections?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
Tue, 04-13-2010 - 11:01pm

I suspect when found out, he made the A her fault: "You never pay attention to me, I felt so unloved and unhappy, of course I had to stray." She may believe this and is trying to show him otherwise.


Just a guess..

Avatar for earnhardt_jr_fan
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Tue, 04-13-2010 - 11:02pm

I don't think she's rewarding him... I know it might appear that way, but I think it's more that she's trying to prove to him that SHE loves him. When men do wrong, what do they usually do? They buy flowers, cards, jewelry, etc. Perhaps she thinks he'll stay with her if she does all these extras things for him?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2009
Wed, 04-14-2010 - 5:09pm
My situation was different, my ap was a family friend, so my xh knew him. But when my xh realized our m was about over, he started buying me tons of gifts, (expensive gifts), flowers, cards, candy, you name it. When we got to court, he wanted it all back, saying that these things were not gifts at all and that I had stole things from him. The judge saw through that and awarded my stuff to me. He spend thousands, when all he had to do was speak kindly to me and defend me, just once, and that would have ended things with ap. That's all it would take, but gifts came with insults and ignorance, and the D did, too!