decrease in interest?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2009
decrease in interest?
3
Sun, 08-23-2009 - 10:48pm

Well, I got a late afternoon text saying "hi" I guess he was just busy today. It was so out of character that I worried and then when I find out he was just doing a lot today, and didn't think about answering my "are you ok?" text, I thought, "Not very considerate."

We've known each other a few months. He was hot and heavy with his texts and emails and seemed really crazy about me. Now I am seeing a decrease in interest from him and the timing is interesting. I can't help but wonder if he is less interested since we had sex for the first time. Have any of you ladies experienced this? I am pretty cynical already when it comes to men and I can't help but wonder if he's just feeling comfy now, thinking he's got me and doesn't have to try anymore.

It hurts and makes me wish we hadn't had sex.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2004
Mon, 08-24-2009 - 12:32am

Hi sunny,


For some reason guys do seem to back off some once they have sex. It's some kind of mechanism they supposedly have, they shut down somewhat. I read about it somewhere.


I was scared to sleep with my AP b/c I was worried that he would lose interest. I always think that about guys. At first my AP had seemed to back off some after our first time. I was sooo upset and

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2008
Mon, 08-24-2009 - 9:14am

I have the same situation. Everything was hot and heavy he admitted he was chasing me, he would initiate texting everyday then sex happened and he totally backed off. It felt like once he caught me the fun was over. We have been back and forth for 8 months now, were done, were not done etc. We have had sex 3 other times and each time he freaks out and says we have to be done just for a week later he goes back to wanting me again. If I back off and give him the cold shoulder it drives him crazy and he chases me again.


It's very frustrating and

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-18-2008
Mon, 08-24-2009 - 12:20pm

I just move on when that happens. Probably explains why I have 3 AP right now (#3 is from OOT) - AP #2 was one of those back-offers, after we had sex the first time he hung back for 3-4 months, I guess it was, and then came back on like gang busters. We have been steady for over a year now. Go figure

-jana