Desperate for Help
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 10-29-2003 - 9:36am |
I'll try to make it as brief as possible. I have been married for a little over 2 year. Right now I am not happy in my marraige at all, and have gotten to the point where I can't even convince myself to try and make it better. My husband has never been able to admit that we have problems, he just makes everything seem like its no big deal. But basically, it has gotten to the point that I can't even stand being around him most of the time, but I am very scared to leave him. I have left before, but he always got me to come back.
Anyway, I just wanted to give that as background info, the problem I am really trying to figure out is what to do with the thoughts and feeling I am having for another man. The man in question is a friend of both mine and my husband's and he is married, I don't think he is very happy with his wife and i think that he cheats on her. But, I can not stop thinking about him. It has gotten to the point where I find myself thinking and fantasizing about him constantly, even at home when I am trying to hang out with my husband. I am not even completely sure why I am attracted to him so much. He is not the kind of man I am normally attracted to. But, now I am at a point where I can't make these thoughts go away.
I don't know if I want to get involved with him or not, so far we are just friends and he has no idea of my feelings. But I really think that at the very least he is very physically attracted to me. There are definately a lot of signs. So much that even my husband told me a few weeks ago that he thinks this friend "has a thing for me"
I really want to be able to spend some time alone with him to at least sort things out and decide what I really what, but I don't know how to do this without my husband finding out, I really don't want to just bring it up because I am scared he would feel guilty and tell my husband. How do I figure out if he would be interested in getting involved without taking too much of a risk. I really think he would, and I feel like I need to do something just because I can't stop thinking about it and the desire is killing me.
Anyway, I'll cut it off now. Sorry it's so long, but please take the time to help me in any way possible, with any part of this possible

Pages
I really think you need to talk to your husband and decide if you want to continue to be with him before you bring another person into the equation.
Meshell
Just my 2 cents.
Take care,
kt
Pages