Did he really SAY that?
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| Sun, 10-05-2008 - 5:37am |
I had to share with someone ... AP and I have recently been talking about working together on a volunteer basis with a local nonprofit group. This would be the first time he and I have had any "official" ties to each other. It's a deal where he has worked with this group of people for a while and he is wanting to bring me in as well.
I had already told him that I couldn't pretend to be just friends forever and that the only way I was willing to do this volunteer work was if there was a light at the end of the tunnel for all of this secrecy. Fast forward a couple of days and we were talking again and I said it really boils down to recognition of my role in his life. That is a huge reason why I am feeling odd about this whole thing. It's not that we would be holding hands or being demonstrative. It is a professional setting. It's just that, like another couple in our committee, I would like to be seen as partners. I deserve to stand beside him in the open.
He said, "when the time comes for us to be known as a couple, then that is how we will introduce ourselves. If people start to ask questions before then, I will deal with that and explain things. I understand that things are not happening on the exact timeline or as fast as you might like them to be."
This man has NEVER, not once, come out and said that we would get there eventually. He has NEVER use the word "when" in any context when our future is involved. He's not so much the planning sort. I am afraid to draw conclusions, and I will ask him to clarify, but I was pretty damn happy to hear that one little word.

(((hugs))) and best of luck!
Congratulations....Don't over analyze this, he clearly wants you to be more involved
in his life and what he does and wants to spend his volunteer time with someone he
clearly cares about. That is the message I believe he is sending so this is a big step
for both of you and I think you should accept it as taking your R to the next level.