Different Stages of an Affair??

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2009
Different Stages of an Affair??
3
Wed, 10-14-2009 - 7:47pm

Just curious, are there different stages to affairs; such as different phases you go through, or different levels of an affair, or maybe a certain point you reach and you just know things are different and you are closer?


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2004
Wed, 10-14-2009 - 10:19pm

Life,


I think there are different phases to all relationships, whether it's an A or not. I can tell in my situation that things have changed and that we are closer. I'm also more in the reality stage and more out of the dreamland phase. We are more comfortable with one another. He still gives me butterflies but I have become calmer now and more at ease. I still have days when I feel nuts but I am making some progress. I also realize that we may not end up together. A few months ago the thought would have crushed me. It still hurts to think

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2008
Thu, 10-15-2009 - 6:57am

IMO, an A can last many years if it is an EA but the moment it is PA, it then definitely has an expiry date, sooner than later.Its the excitement and fear of getting caught which keeps the passion alive in PA but an EA is an Affair of the heart which finds solace once you are as close to the person as one can be.There are stories of people getting a feeling about the other without communicating to one another (which are quite rare though), knowing what the other is thinking ,respect,understanding ,care ,love ,physical attraction (the most difficult part to stop yourself from),desire to be physically intimate but most of all being so emotionally attached that you can feel the person around you all the time and read their minds.
you feel more closer to the person than you are with yourself.it happens but the cases are far and few.
If you want peace of mind and soul,emotional affair will give you that but not a PA.

But EA can rip your hearts till you reach acceptance.I am SM ( divorced) with a MW and struggled a few years before reaching acceptance.She lives close by so seeing her everyday feels like she lives with me.I still havent reached the place when i can feel or know what she is thinking,lol but maybe one day.

so yes, you can feel closer with each passing day or you may one day get up and feel dirty( in PA) and get out of it,depends on where you are.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2007
Fri, 10-16-2009 - 3:37pm

As someone already mentioned -- there are different stages to any type of R... Anyhow, I am a MW & by the end of

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