Do you regret your affair?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2009
Do you regret your affair?
15
Wed, 05-27-2009 - 6:59pm

Hi ladies,


You might not remember me. I posted several weeks ago. To give you a recap: I'm 35, no kids, married for almost 4 years. My husband is a wonderful person, but we lack sexual chemistry. I do not want to divorce or separate. At the same time, I find it daunting to think that I may never have a fulfilling sex life. We want kids and I keep telling myself that the reason we don't have kids is the lack of a sex life. I know that real reason is me being conflicted about a sexless - but otherwise fulfilling - marriage.


When I posted back in mid-April, I had a crush on a coworker. Nothing had happened and I was avoiding him for that very reason. Nothing has happened physically. Although I don't feel like I'm "playing with fire" right now, I think I'm slowly lighting that match. I find myself thinking about him more. I told him that I was taking a walk around lunch time yesterday (I didn't invite him) and he found me at noon time and we took a short walk together and had a really nice time. Today, he sat next to me at a meeting (trust me, it was deliberate, not random)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
Sat, 05-30-2009 - 6:02am

great question


sw pov here, no longer in a, although obviously still on my mind at times


regrets...mid 40's and i have never been m. why, because i have seen


so many mm that have affairs, and i have been involved in a few


when i was younger. going on 10 yrs of physical celebacy at this point


at least with a

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2009
Sat, 05-30-2009 - 10:50am

I haven't had a chance to check this board since I started this thread a few days ago. Thank you all so much for responding so openly and honestly to my very candid question. It really means a lot to me.


Withclarity - you asked me if I ever did a pros and cons list. Yes, I did, but as you can see, it didn't help me very much ;-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-02-2009
Sun, 05-31-2009 - 10:45pm
Yes, I guess I do regret my affair.



iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2009
Mon, 06-01-2009 - 6:55am

"Sex not being good is not a reason to leave a marriage or cheat...that can be fixed easily...to have an affair because of it is a cop out!!"


I have to strongly disagree with this statement. Sex

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2009
Fri, 06-12-2009 - 6:34pm
I tend to agree with what you posted on April over at the relationship saver board ummm Ask Dr Shoshanna post number 32270.22. It offered a lot of insight.


Edited 6/12/2009 6:35 pm ET by woodyjohnson

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