does anyone worry about rumors?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2004
does anyone worry about rumors?
7
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 3:58pm
Both MM and I think we are being SOO, SOOO careful, but then again, we wonder if there are rumors going around. I'm worried maybe we have our heads in the sand, or clouds is more like it. Especially, around a workplace, it seems like people just LOVE to gossip and spread rumors. Have any of you ever had rumors start, and if so, how did you squelch/deny/keep 'em from spreading like wildfire?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2004
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 4:05pm
OM and I worked together until very recently (he's transferring to a different branch) and rumors did start flying about us, mainly because I talk to him so often. I just do the typical deny, deny, deny when I hear anything about it...now that OM transferred to a different office I am sure it will die down soon.

Soleil

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-09-2003
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 4:25pm
My MM and I used to get rumors started a lot, even before anything serious was going on. Sometimes our friends would mention it, and we would just laugh about it and shrug it off to them. Like we'd say something like, "oh yeah, sure, like that's really happening!" and then we'd just kind of laugh about it and it always got dropped. It may sound silly, but it's always worked for me. Good luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2004
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 5:36pm
Boy have I lived that...

I worked with my OM. Rumors started about us because we hung out alot. It all started as a friendship - neither of us were looking for anything to happen. I never hid the fact that I hung out with him from my H. But, the H never knew where it was leading.

Then, the rumors started. Although we have been very very careful, people started telling things about us. The fact that we were intimate, that we were having an A. We just laughed it off and denied the whole thing. I admitted to my H that we had kissed, and that I had an emotional connection with him very strongly, but that nothing intimate had happened. With what was going on between the H and I, he understood that he had driven me into someone else's life - even if it was just for emotional support. He was ok on believing that, but others at work actually started going to our family members and telling them about it (the H's and my family members). It got huge - big blow up.

H now says he still believes me when I say I didn't get intimate with the OM. Family and friends have kinda calmed down, now that I have left my H and we are apart, but they still look at me as having an A...but H isn't listening to them. There were only certain people that knew what was going on - three great friends that the OM and I have (and they are trusted) and the OM's family (mom, dad, sis, bro, etc). Other than that, no one ever saw anything but hanging out alot, and being flirtatious...maybe we had been caught kissing. I don't think so, because we were always so careful, but I figured I'd at least own up to that to my H just in case.

Deny girl, and never bend. Don't let the rumors (even if they really are true) get you down or ruin this. They just don't have anything in their life exciting to talk about :-) lol Good luck, and remember that you wouldn't be in such an emotional relationship/affair if it wasn't worth something. FMH6

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2003
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 6:24pm
You know, it's wierd. SO is sooooo concerned about what ex will find out about us in court, yet, at work, he seems totally nonplussed. For instance, there was a woman on his staff he was joking with on Saturday. She's Brazilian. She's training a new woman who is also a Brazilian. SO and She were joking around about the new girl, because she really is beautiful. SO said something (with me there) about not liking American girls, and his team member shot a look my way real fast, as if to say, but what about HER??? lol!! I told him that I thought she thought she knew what she knew and all he said was so what?? He has said that before. And seriously, he does always say that they only THINK they know what they think they know. And there were rumours about us for a year before we hooked up, simply because we're such a great team. But generally speaking, we do deny stuff ("I'd have to look up his number on the staff directory, it's not like I know it off the top of my head"), and make light of stuff ("oh yeah, I'm lost without her on her days off!"). So far, we've been together a year and folks really don't know what to think of us.

Lucky

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2003
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 9:19pm
Hi. I've been lurking. OM and I have been at this since mid Jan but the rumors started at least 9 months ago and came on heavy maybe two months ago. I have a decoy now who calls me 3 times a day at work. Decoy makes me blush and we are often on the phone when OM (my boss ) walks in . OM knows about Decoy. ...Yeah I'm seeing the manager just not THAT manager. more later ....can't believe I just posted that.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2004
Tue, 04-27-2004 - 10:31am
You know, rumors are pretty funny things.
cl-noregretsyet (co-cl of MAS board)
&#16
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2004
Tue, 04-27-2004 - 11:38am
Once OM and I had the door closed (totally innocent) and people had smirks on their faces and were making "knowing" comments when we opened it. He pretended to fix his zipper and be perfectly "satisfied". People figured he wouldn't be that out in the open if something was really going on.