does he just want sex?
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does he just want sex?
| Tue, 09-23-2003 - 4:20pm |
Hello, I have posted here before. I have a question, how do you know if he is just in it for sex? I mean my mm and I have been haveing affair for over a year and he tells me things like....you are beautiful, I am falling in love with you. One time I asked him somthing and he said "well we are not a couple yet" but it seems like when we meet all he really wants to do is fool around or have sex. I mean we also do talk a little and he hugs me. When we are done fooling around he usually talks for a bit and leaves to go back to work. I mean I know maybe he feels a little guilty and stuf too. Last time I was trying to tell him things that were on my mind, which is very hard for me to do as I'm kinda a shy person around him still, I am working on that though, anyway he said to me öpen up with me adn tell me what you want to say" then he said Ï may be feeling the same way you are" so maybe we both are feeling in love but we have not said it yet. I guess I am just hoping he is not just in it for the sex. I don't know guess I Just had to vent a little thanks for listening : )
Sarah

every R changes over time. jmo, but i believe the dynamics of any R change the longer you are involved with someone, whether it's your H, lover, children, friends, whatever. in my case, MM and i have expressed our deeper feelings recently and the "love" word has been used by both of us. but we are taking the R one day at a time because we are both comfortable with the situation as it is. there are no long-term plans for a future together. he and i both agree that we're in this A with no end in sight.
enjoy your MM for the times you have with him. try not to "read" feelings/thoughts into his actions. the action speaks for itself. from your post, it sounds to me like your MM is developing those "deeper feelings."
but you need to realize that if you're not happy in this A, you should, at the very least, communicate to him how you are feeling regarding the "just sex" aspect of your post.
take care,
gurl