Don't know how to handle it this time
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Don't know how to handle it this time
| Sun, 02-15-2009 - 9:35am |
Not sure how to handle not hearing from MM for the last 3 days. For those who haven't read my former posts, he left his wife ( again, 5th time) and moved into his own place a week ago Friday. Although he agreed to do things my way this time, be completely divorced before we could actually be together, he wasn't thrilled about it. I know he was lonely and he kept asking me to just leave my husband and home now and be with him, promised he wouldn't bail on me and go back to his W like all the other times, but I just couldn't trust him not to after being thrown under the bus so many times. Fast forward to last Wednesday night...he texted me a few times after work, then later that night I heard nothing until early Thursday morning when he told me "they" were going out of town because a relative died. I asked him if that was the real reason and if they were back together and he said no, they were not, but she was going along. I sent him a couple texts Friday morning saying I missed him and to let me know how he was doing, haven't heard anything.
I've been going over and over in my head how to deal with this Monday morning when I see him at work...I don't know if I should just ignore him and let him come to me and explain ( if the coward will) or if I should look him up right away and play dumb and tell him I was worried sick not hearing from him all weekend....I don't know, I have such mixed emotions right now..I'm so angry that he would this to me again. I cautiously let him back in my life after he went on and on about how he knew he f*cked up going back, he hated himself because he knew if he'd gone through with everything before, we'd be together now, he cant and wont live without me, he is not IN love with her and can't be happy there...GOD, it would be so easy if I didn't love him..
I've been going over and over in my head how to deal with this Monday morning when I see him at work...I don't know if I should just ignore him and let him come to me and explain ( if the coward will) or if I should look him up right away and play dumb and tell him I was worried sick not hearing from him all weekend....I don't know, I have such mixed emotions right now..I'm so angry that he would this to me again. I cautiously let him back in my life after he went on and on about how he knew he f*cked up going back, he hated himself because he knew if he'd gone through with everything before, we'd be together now, he cant and wont live without me, he is not IN love with her and can't be happy there...GOD, it would be so easy if I didn't love him..

Good for you for holding your ground. AP and I both admit that we both have a problem with the guilt to leave our H & W. He is concerned she will hurt herself. I just feel bad, H has never treated me well, but yet I still worry about him being alone and hurt. Then I wonder how long I can hold out. How long will this be enough and when is it my turn to be happy?
Hopefully, this all works out for you. Are you still seeing him through this?
((((gabby))))
I'm so sorry you are going through this. Maybe ask yourself how you can trust this man after he did this to you 5 times... even if he moves out 'for good' the next time you will never be able to trust him fully... do you want to start off life with him like that? Don't put yourself through this gabby... don't contact him.
((hugs))
trixie
Does his W know about you? If she does, I can't imagine why she keeps taking him back. If she doesn't, what does he tell her when he leaves her?
Good luck {{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}