Is this the end?
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Is this the end?
| Tue, 05-04-2004 - 7:30am |
Edited 5/5/2004 5:44 am ET ET by neurotica2004
Edited 5/5/2004 5:45 am ET ET by neurotica2004
Edited 5/5/2004 5:45 am ET ET by neurotica2004

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It sounds like the ol' "Its not you its me" routine. Has he felt guilty before? Has he done this before? I forget your story. I would give him some distance, it is really hard to do, but if he is a busy guy then a few days of NC from you might make his heart grow fonder. He has feeling for you and you're obviously important but he may be being torn for some reason all of a sudden. Let him have some time as hard as that will be on you, i think you will find it will all work out.
good luck, I'm thinking of you
deedee
Edited 10/1/2004 7:02 pm ET ET by sally289
give it some time -- and if MM doesn't come back around, calling and saying i miss you, i need you, i adore you (and most of them do, eventually!) then you can move on knowing that you kept your self-respect and dignity in this whole A.
good luck honey and keep moving forward, always!
life
I'm feeling down too, please don't start crying or I will too!! Take care honey,
Dusty
Oh my goodness. I'm in the same situation.
My MM told me he was unsure of us. I stayed and we talked but when I tried to leave. He asked me not too. Then he says he was "just thinking" about it. Either way he said it. I left uncertain of anything. We hugged and parted well, but still. I have no idea what's next. Or maybe I do, but I'm afraid to admit it, :(.
That was Sunday. Have not heard from him since. I'm so tempted to email him, but I know better. I'm just going to wait on him.
Is it really over??! Half of me says it is, but the other half says it isn't..
My eyes are clouded too, :).
:)
Circe
It almost sounds as if he is testing, to see if you are willing to continue with less than the current time/attention that he has been giving you. I.e., are you able to accept his rules/needs/time. Or trying to see if he slowly backs off, you will end it instead of him having to do so. You mention you've noticed things have been different for a while...
However, apparently, (as much as I hate to admit it) , I must be a romantic, because I briefly thought, it sounds as if he cares for you and is saddened that he is unable to devote as much time to you as he would like, and is therefore dealing with the conflicting feelings he is experiencing...and of course that would make for a more happy scenario... A while back, online, conversations with my MM started increasing quickly and becoming so much more intense. And then fairly suddenly, I heard similar comments. He really backed off, basically initiating alot of generic conversation - for him a life changing event was about to occur. So I backed off, and slowly but surely, things have resumed to their previous state. I doubt I will ever hear him say he feels guilty for cheating, it is transformed into I feel horrible for expecting you to conform to my life..and this goes through spells..
Of course, I am still fairly naive and very new to all of this... But didn't we probably enter our Rs with MM through our gut feelings? I suppose we should continue to be very aware of our intuitiveness and guts, especially when they are nagging us. I agree with those suggesting to wait and let him contact you, even though it is so very difficult...thinking of you
hope
Stay strong everyone (especially you, Dusty - my "no tears" buddy. Have to admit, D, have not been doing too well these last few days.) I am trying every minute of every day.
n
I hope you're okay. Lets try to hang in there until something good happens to us. Hopefully, our MM will come to their senses and come back to us soon. And what you said about you can't make someone care for you and think you're special, I think that they DO care for us and think we're special. I can't believe after a couple of years they have no feelings whatsoever for us. But they feel guilty about those feelings. I'm still keeping my fingers crossed for you. Take care,
Dusty
Sweetie, I know exactly how you feel. Really I do. I feel exactly the same way. I feel totally mixed up inside, feel like I could cry at any moment. I feel so fragile. So I am right there with you - and am sending you a huge, huge HUG. I am really trying to keep occupied. I have been trying to work hard all day and when there is a little moment to breathe, I have been trying to sort out domestic bits and pieces - even little mindless things. Anything just to keep my head straight. I have to, because otherwise I am reminded of what has taken place and I just feel sick inside. I keep thinking "is that it? Is that all that happens after 3 years? I just get a it's-not-you-it's-me ?" .. and it makes me feel like I was worth nothing to him, meant nothing. I wish I had a million words of wisdom, I really do. But I don't. All I can say is that I am here for you. I am not your MM, but I will try to be strong for you!
x
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