Feeling different about new ema
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Feeling different about new ema
| Thu, 01-15-2004 - 10:50am |
This is my second A. The first one was with a guy from high school that i was crazy about, but only when we started the A, did he find out how i felt back then. And of course as soon as we got deeper into it i fell for him all over again. He swore he wouldn't break my heart a second time. Good thing i didnt believe him. But during our A my life revolved around him completely, i soon started to neglect things around my house, and in my marriage. We ended it two months ago and i was heart broken. I quickly got over it by jumping into a new one. But this one is totally different, i had never met this MM before, just waves and hellos everyday when i saw him. His kids go to a daycare by my house, i would watch for him every morning and go out when he was there. I finally called him over and i gave him my email and number. We have been together many times, and sex is always part of our time. Though i think of him alot during the day mainly becuz he does things to me my H never has, my life at home has gotten better. I am trying despertly not to get any feelings for him, but they are creeping in, i try to occupy my mind with other things when i dont hear from him. Is it possible that the A i am having is making my marriage better and sex with my H better? And if there is anyone who is or was in this kind of situation, how do i stop my feelings before they get away? we have never discussed leaving our spouses, though i think he is pretty free to do what he wants as long as she is happy. Almost like they married just to be married. I miss him terribly when i dont see or hear from him in a few days, though its always been that way, I dont let him know how i feel though. Please help if you can. Thank you and sorry its so long.
Signatures On
| Thu, 01-15-2004 - 12:27pm |
I don't think you can stop your feelings. If that were possible, most of us wouldn't be posting to this board right now! You can do your best to occupy your mind with other things, as you mentioned, but EMAs are emotional roller coasters. The downslides come with the territory. A man recently told me in every relationship there is a two steps forward, one step back situation. He said if one of the involved parties doesn't take that step back, the relationship either goes way too fast and fizzles or one of the involved parties totally loses interest. It makes sense because that's what my MM always does, but I can tell you that it gets to a point where the two steps forward isn't even fun anymore because you know the one step back is coming. No matter how hard you try you're going to find yourself falling deeper and deeper in love. I am concerned, though, that you keep having these As. Do you think you have to have two relationships to be happy or is it that you're just unhappy in your marriage? If it's the latter, what's to say you won't someday be with this MM of yours permanently and then turn around and do the same thing to him...
