Feeling down...yet again

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-14-2004
Feeling down...yet again
13
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 11:42am
I don't know why, but I'm feeling down again today. It has been almost a month since I was able to see my OW and unfortunately, I won't be able to see her for at least two more months. We talk almost every night on IM and the phone, but it seems we are drifting apart a bit lately. We both have busy lives so sometimes we are tired late at night. I guess I just feel like she has been a little distant lately. I know that is to be expected. But I've had jealousy problems in the past and I don't want to let those out again so I am coming here to vent. I know she loves me and even though she doesn't have to be faithful to me (she is S and I am M), she has been and continues to be. So I really have nothing to be jealous about, but she tells me about her day and everytime she mentions a guy showing her attention I feel pangs of jealousy. It doesn't happen that often, but when it does it is kind of like a punch in the stomach. I think it is because I'm so far away and I know I can't see her right now. So again, I don't really know what I'm looking for, just a pick-me-up I guess. Thanks everyone.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-14-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 2:02pm
You hit the nail on head man. That is exactly how I feel. I know that it is all in my head, but that doesn't make it any less real to me. What I need is for her to reassure me but I don't want to appear too weak and needy so I can't ask her to do that. I know that if I just keep this inside eventually I'll get a sign from her that everything is fine. It is definitely difficult to spend this time apart. Anyone who says absence makes the heart grow fonder is nuts.

Your suggestion really made me think. If I were to see her, I would have to drive about 5 hours and probably only be able to spend a couple of hours talking. And then 5 hours back. It does seem insane, but if she can make it work, I'm going to try to do it. I need to at least have those few moments with her. Of course I'll have to come up with an excuse for being gone from home so long and come up with the money for gas, but right now that sounds like a great idea.

Thanks for the support. And for understanding that illogical anxiety that comes from being separated by time and distance.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 2:18pm
Hang in there Omaha. I know it is difficult I have not seen MW in 3 days and I am going nuts and previously went 1.5 months without seeing her and it was tearing me up inside so much so that one day W even asked if i was OK. If you can steal some time I also recomend it, even if you just get a single kiss and hug and have to drive back.

I always think of the movie "City of Angels" after Meg Ryan dies and they ask Nick Cage was it worth becoming mortal to then lose her and his answer was "It was worth just to be able to touch her once"

We are here for u, and suffering along with you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 3:28pm
I've not seen MM in almost 6 weeks and it will probably be at least another 3 or so before I see him again (though I talk to him pretty much every day, it's just not the same). I physically need him...not always for sex (LOL), but I just need his support sometimes, you know what I mean? He's out of town and I'll have no phone contact for at least a week and right now I need him so much. It's hard to stay positive.

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