feeling kinda low
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| Sun, 10-19-2008 - 2:04pm |
saw ap last week monday for lunch, tuesday we ate out..then went back to my place he was there until midnight, wednesday no AP, thursday for lunch-he gave me the biggest bottle of Belvedere Vodka that's sold (love my Vodka..he's given this to me before), friday no AP was mad at his azz because of thursday's discussion at lunch and how he treats me like a kid sometimes..he even calls me "KID" at times like i'm his daughter, saturday-didn't know AP was coming over but again my son knew...he came to see my son off to his homecoming formal and to give him money for afterwards to buy my son's date dinner or whatever they were gonna do...it was a surprise for me i guess..they like to play tricks on me..(no AP is not son's father..)
After we dropped my son off, I was in a funky mood..things have been welling up inside me for a while..what I mean is, I have a great AP, he loves me dearly and I love him dearly..but..I have questions that I'm afraid to ask him because I'm very scared that they will turn into an argument or somehow make him leave me...although I know you can't control what someone does, they are gonna leave if they want to leave.

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If I were you, and if he does ever call back, I'd apologize for my drunken outburst.
Going to be blunt here....
If he knows you get nasty when drunk why the hell would he buy you liquor??? My advice would be to stay away from liquor because obviously your behavior gets very ugly. You shouldn't drink KNOWING that you get this way. That is the REAL problem here. How long do you expect him or anyone to put up with that. I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't talk with you again.
You + Liquor = disaster
"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss
there's no doubt that we'll speak, AP loves me very very very much and on occasion has told me that if he never met wifey and knew i existed he would have had a long term relationsship with me..(think he felt pressured into "M" with "W" because of the child..i hate that)..him and w are two totally different people with different goals..we have similar qualities and are just alike...you are right i do need to apologize for my drunken outburst...i agree with that...i totally agree...i feel bad because i looked at my son's celly (yes i invaded his privacy but i pay the bill) and they've been texting all morning about game day..the football games that are on..that's what they do on sundays...i'm certain he won't be here today because he's mad but friday sat and sunday are our days together..early sundays we all eat then he and my son watch football and make fun of me because i don't know what i'm talking about...i feel bad because i know he's itchin to come over to spend time with my son...he may still come..the both love football....(he lives an hour and 1/2 away and yes we spend all that time together).
"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss
Tyger -
I am sorry to hear about your evening - but yes - I will echo what everyone else said - you need to leave the alcohol ALONE!!!
you are right..and guess what..before 4.5 years ago..i never used to drink..what is that about? maybe it's because it's something you can do...ya know...and you are right 1 drink is enough!!! and maybe wayyy too much at times...but i say it everytime...ahhh i can do more than one more...but it never works....you are also right in that i should apologize, although things should come out but not in that way...i will definately check my phone...
someone should have slapped the hell out of me last night..i was hoping my neighbor would come downstairs and say "girl i will slap the heck outta you if you don't settle down" but noone was home..it was a saturday night..everyone was out doing what i tried to do...
me + alcohol + condition = bad things happen...and i will def lay off.
thanks....i appreciate it...
"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss
"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss
Oh, so we're in the same boat. S w/ MM. Why do we do it to ourselves? I could date just about any guy I wanted, but I fall in love w/ a MM. Dumb, dumb, dumb.
So are you feeling better? I read your last post, and you were feeling pretty crappy. We all do stupid sh*t, he'll get over it. Just apologize, and then have awesome make up sex!
"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss
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