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|Sat, 03-22-2014 - 8:28pm|
A little over 4 years ago I met the "perfect" man. To be blunt (I guess I may as well be if I want to provide a true history of this relationship) I had never stuggled to find romance but I decided this was "the one" and we got married just over a year later and have now been married for almost 3 years. The problem is that I have since realised that H is THE stereotypically "perfect" guy... not MY perfect guy and that I have made a huge mistake. H is a good guy and generally a good H but there is just no spark and in spite of an outwardly good marriage (my friends and family all love him) I am unhappy and feel terribly lonely. Having realised this a while ago I started trying to make changes and eventually worked up the courage to tell H I was unhappy and why but H just doesn't listen to me and everything carries on just the same. I don't want to leave H I just need something more.
I had been longing to get a bit of the spark back for some time, to feel attractive again, when I recently bumped into an old friend with whom there had been a spark but due to it being the wrong time in our lives we had never got together. He was keen to meet me to catch up and after a few misgivings I agreed to do so. Nothing happened but we talked a lot and the chemistry was definitely still there and are difinitely now having an EA. I now know I want things to go further but having never done this before I really just don't know what to do. I don't know if going down this road will make me feel better or just destroy my marriage and although I want this man I definitely feel like I am letting my husband down. On the other hand I did approach our marriage issues in an honest straightforward way including suggesting relationship counselling which given his complete lack of response sort of makes me feel I am now entitled to take another route... after all we only live once. Anyway, I don't currently feel able to discuss this with any of my friends and any advice from anyone more experienced than me would be greatly appreciated :-)