FREAKING OUT ... BAD!!!! Need advice.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2010
FREAKING OUT ... BAD!!!! Need advice.
36
Wed, 05-19-2010 - 10:05am

So I went to the dentist yesterday and she mentioned that my gums were bleeding a lot which she said could happen if you're due for your period ... which I'm not, but my last period about 2 weeks ago was much lighter and shorter than normal ... still a day of really heavy bleeding though ... anyway during both my previous pregnancies one of the things that happened to me was that my gums bled almost every time I brushed my teeth ... so I went and bought a test yesterday and took it first thing this am ... it was not the darkest of lines, but there is most definitely a line there ... I can't go get another one or do anything else about it until tomorrow ... but I am obviously freaking out ... so the question is ... do I say anything to him? Why should I have to spend the next 24 + hours freaking out on my own ... but if it's not + then will I have freaked him out for nothing ... and if this is the case he will most certainly run for the hills .... and i don't want to lose him ... What is wrong with me? Here I might be pregnant by a man other than my husband and I'm worried about losing him ... yet I also don't want to spend the next 24 hours dealing with this by myself ...

What should I do???????

Avatar for earnhardt_jr_fan
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Fri, 05-21-2010 - 2:14pm
Are you directing your message to the OP or hischocolate? Chocolate said her AP had a vasectomy. I had a tubal in 1998... AP and I haven't used protection since the very beginning. Nothing irresponsible about it. Sterilization IS birth control. It doesn't address STDs, but if both parties are clean .. What's the harm?
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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2009
Fri, 05-21-2010 - 10:22pm
success rate of a vasectomy is something like 99.8%...both H and AP had one over 15 yrs ago...i think the failure rate of .02% occurs most often in the beginning...i guess you could still say there's a chance...but there's even a chance if we used a condom or i was on the pill or something...if you do it there's a risk...and from that stand point i guess you could call me irresponsible..


Edited 5/21/2010 10:23 pm ET by hischocolate
Avatar for earnhardt_jr_fan
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sat, 05-22-2010 - 12:06am
Well.. From that standpoint aren't we all irresponsible then? All birth control CAN fail!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Sat, 05-22-2010 - 10:52am

I'm thinking

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2009
Sat, 05-22-2010 - 12:03pm

it's hard to tell sometimes on here who a reply is directed towards...lol. i was just sharing my experience...and that i felt i was stupidly worried, but as adults we all know that the only sure way to prevent pregnancy would be to not do the deed.

and even when we know we could've done something to prevent it, we still freak out sometimes...even if pregnancy isn't a possibility there are plenty of irresponsible things done...huge risk in my world just doing what i'm doing...

wishing the original poster peace no matter how things turn out...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Sat, 05-22-2010 - 11:04pm

Does anyone know how OP is?


I agree- A's are hard enough without the added (and stupid) mistake of bringing a baby into it. I went on the pill when my A became physical (my husband has had a vasectomy so I hadnt needed them for years). But yes, we also have to make sure we are 'healthy' and that is difficult because while we get tested- you never know if our respective partners are not having an A of their own.


Its a difficult stitaion but we are adults, not teenagers, and should deal with this stuff with maturity andf responsibility.


Gosh I hope OP is ok.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2010
Sun, 05-23-2010 - 10:24pm
mrm I just want to say that you have been on my mind all weekend and I hope you are doing ok.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 10:56am
mrm, I hope you come back today and tell us what's happening now. Hope everything is good news! I'm worried about you (and it appears some other people here are also!)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2000
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 3:50pm

Actually, I was directing my post to the OP. Just forgot to change the "to" field.

The only thing OP said in regards to birth control is that they don't use it. I just hope that everything works out ok, and that she uses this experience to be more responsible. Yes, birth control can fail and that's a risk everyone on this board takes, but no birth control ALWAYS fails sooner or later.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2009
Mon, 05-24-2010 - 9:17pm
wondering what "no news" means in this case...good news? or what? maybe too busy to post? curious about how things are going...