Friday night blues
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Friday night blues
| Fri, 08-29-2003 - 9:27pm |
Okay my A has been *on* for a year now...I am so in love I can hardly stand it. I am m, so is he. My DH is nevr around, m is a big empty spot of air. I have 2 DS that mean the world to me. They are getting older though and dont need me as much (I mean they wont hang with me as much and I MISS them!) My OM is a professional person and is very busy...he tells me he loves me, calls just about every day but the day he doesn;t is so horrible for me. I dont know how much longer I can go through with any of this. I hate the idea of ending my M...and all the changes that will entail. But I want to be with OM so much..he has 2 kids as well, both in HS and has said he would never leave his wife while they are young....but he cant see spending the rest of his life with her either.....are these affairs always so hopeless? Just need someone to talk to. thanks for listening.

I believe the A is what you make of it....if it is wonderful just go with it. I know it is hard when you don't get to talk to him every day and when you really want him to call and he either cannot or doesn't! Just go with it...on those days find something to do...since the kiddos are getting older and don't want to hang with mom, because we all know that is not cool, I always tried to make sure there was something I could do. That way your brain is occupied for a while and you are not dwelling on why he is not calling, texting or emailing!
This is JMHO...take it for what it is worth! Love to all, Red
Two things strike me in your post...
First, you can't stand the day that he doesn't call you. Why? Lonliness? Doubt? What is it that makes that one day so intolerable, when you know that if he missed one day he will undoubtedly call the next?
Second, he won't leave while his kids are young... how old is that, exactly? If they're in high school, they're already becoming quite self-sufficient young adults. Does he mean once they leave the house for college or work? Do you think he will leave even then? Do you want him to?
I'm not asking you to answer those questions here... just think about what you are saying. Based on those two snippets alone, I am inclined to think that we need to find you a passion -- not a man! lol -- but a job, hobby, a focus that you find as all-consuming as you do your MM. Something that is just for you and will be there for you whether or not MM is in your life. I also think you need to listen carefully to what MM is telling you, and see if your vision of the future really matches up to his.
It's only hopeless if you keep hoping for something you've already been told will never happen...
Good luck, and take care of yourself.
lily