Friday, Roll Call and a little something

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Friday, Roll Call and a little something
33
Fri, 01-30-2004 - 12:09pm
I like to post every now and then:) Enjoy! NMR

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

...one old love she can imagine going back to...

… and one who reminds her how far she has come...

…enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to...

…something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...

…a youth she's content to leave behind... …a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age...

...a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...

…one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry...

...a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family...

...eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored..

…a feeling of control over her destiny...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...

..how to fall in love without losing herself...

...how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship… …when to walk away... ...that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents... ...that her childhood may not have been perfect...but its over... ...what she would and wouldn't do for love or more... ...how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it... ...whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally... ...where to go... be it to her best friend's kitchen table... or a charming inn in the woods when her soul needs soothing... ...what she can and can't accomplish in an hour, a month...and a year...


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2003
Tue, 02-03-2004 - 9:34pm
Hi Dusty,

Thanks for sharing. Your reply is one of the reasons why I ask these such questions. I ofen wonder what makes it possible for someone to put themselves through this and you have been kind enough to candidly answer. I often suspect what drives EMA's are things you described to me. It just appears that while many people like to discuss one aspect of the A's, they don't like to go too deep into the dark side the was more or less the road that took them to their A.

Thanks again. Good night.

Pen

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-06-2003
Tue, 02-03-2004 - 10:19pm
Dictionary? for definitely??? LMAO



This board isn't meant for "'hard questions,' people who aren't in As, or opinions"... but hey, if you must, squeeze those questions in with your "busy" schedule.

I'll get over it.

LOL

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Tue, 02-03-2004 - 10:22pm
Hi before you go to bed. Anyways, I have read your posts. And I have no complaints against what you said. You want to know what's going on in our heads.

This is #2 H for me. And I don't want another divorce. And I'm afraid he's going to die on me from the drinking. And MM makes me somewhat happy right now. But I have no illusions. MM has never said anything about wanting to leave his W to be with me. And I've mentioned to him that if I was single again (because I almost left H a few months ago) that I would start dating vigorously. And I don't think he liked that alot.

But this is my life. And I really feel strongly that you have to do what you have to, to make yourself survive and stay sane. I don't think God would think that its wrong to love 2 men. People have many loves in their lives, you don't have to give it all to one person, no one does that.

Anyhow, that's my reasoning. Be it wrong, or be it right!! Take care,

Dusty
xxxx
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2003
Tue, 02-03-2004 - 10:46pm

>:




Edited 6/15/2009 12:23 pm ET by opal_fire
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Tue, 02-03-2004 - 10:54pm
Well #1, I like hockey, GO REDWINGS!! And #2, who is debasing themselves? If you don't like our stories, don't tune in!! We're here for each other because we've got no one else usually. Although I have told a close friend lately what's going on with H and MM and she pretty well supports me. She's got problems with her H and although she says she wouldn't do what I am, she is sure interested in the details!! So what does that tell you??
xxxx
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-31-2003
Wed, 02-04-2004 - 9:34am

/




Edited 6/15/2009 12:24 pm ET by opal_fire
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Wed, 02-04-2004 - 10:20am

girls, girls, girls, settle down here!!


opal, pensive was originally posting to me, but you joined in, right?

CL-Gurlfriend50

Co-CL of My Affair Support Board

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2003
Wed, 02-04-2004 - 6:11pm
Hi Gurl, Opal, Dusty, Happy, and everyone else

I enjoy corresponding to all of you too, even in the hockey matches!

Gurl, the reason why I catagorize questions as "hard" is because I notice people usually dance around them for a VERY long time before answering... IF they answer the actual quetion in full at all. Also, I see conflicting responses. So yes, I pose some of them again. Not to go tic for tac with the redundant questions,but some of the responses seem like smoke and mirrors to me...answering something along the lines of the question, but not the actual question. If you choose to veiw them as redundant questions, then you simply view them as redundant, but I appreciate the answers you choose to give.

Also Gurl, I find it quite interesting that in other posts (ones I have read but have not replied to)that you have strong feelings and love for MM, to the point you and he are thinking of being together more formally or something like that, which implies you are both thinking of ditching your SO's. But if you found out he was seeing another woman, he would suddenly be "rubbish" and then you would acknowledge that he is "just a sexual partner". Then again, you posted something about "What would it take for you to give up AP" and it seemed like you were entertaining the thought of giving up your A to just concentrate on your R with BF, being that he has come so far and all. I just find that "interesting" you might say. But nonetheless, I really do appreciate what you are sharing.

Pen

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Thu, 02-05-2004 - 9:08am

CL-Gurlfriend50

Co-CL of My Affair Support Board

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2004
Thu, 02-05-2004 - 11:27am
Good morning Gurl and Pen.. forgive me if I'm out of line. I'm new to the message boards.. but just a quick observation... Pen -- is there a point to the 'hard' questions? What I'm wondering about is your motive. Are you, as you claim, just curious -- looking for validation because of something you are or aren't doing, or trying to get the ladies here to change? Truly -- no criticism.. just wondering. And gurl... you sound like one of the most 'together' ladies I've spoken to in a long time. With or without MM and BF, you won't be alone. You've got yourself for company and that's pretty darn good. And I'm thinking we should know better than anyone that just because someone finds someone else attractive (and persues something with that other someone), does not mean they don't want us... Mind you, that's my philosophical reaction - not something I could probably practice. SSis