Is this game playing on my part?
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| Mon, 11-23-2009 - 12:24pm |
I'm new to the whole A thing, and I don't know what I want, but I can't go on the way it is. It's making me crazy. If you haven't read my posts, here's my short story. AP and I are friends 20 years. He'a my H's friend, too. In the last year things have gotten "weird" between us. We kissed at first, then we had two instances where we did everything but IC. Second time was a surprise b/c he previously told me that he didn't want to do anything with me again out of guilt.
So, I have real feelings for this guy. I know he "cares" about me as a friend, but other than that I think I'm his booty call. I like being with him, but here's the thing - afterwards I feel alone and upset b/c he doesn't call me or anything otherwise. We aren't a couple or anything. He treats me like a booty call or a friend to hang out with. I don't know what his feelings are and he's not the type of guy to be all lovey dovey and have pillow talk and stuff. I'm not really that way myself.

you are setting yourself up for a disappointment. You have good insight and know where he is coming from. If you do not want to lose him as a friend, just let him know that you do not want him to be anything else but a friend and that what you shared is best to stay in the past, that you just don't think of him that way anymore. You have to act maybe to get the words out but if you keep at it long enough, it'll be the norm and you will move on.
If you try to come clean, it'll be awkward for him and hurtful for you and you'll be in a murkier place. This way, at least, you get to keep control, which will help you move on.
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