Gave MM 2 options...

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2003
Gave MM 2 options...
3
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 3:20pm
My MM asked his W for a D a few weeks ago but nothing has happened. Things have gotten out of hand lateley his W calls me she thinks we are friends but its obvious we are more...she just does not want to see it. MM financially cant get up and go he just got steady income coming in this week. I have been so drained out with his W calling me just talking about her H my MM - MM tells me she is doing it to aggrevate me.

Today MM asked me what was wrong I told him I could not handle it. I said I always do what makes Sandy happy and I have always said as long as im happy I will be here with you. I said Sandy is not happy. He said what do I have to do to make Sandy happy...I asked are you sure you want to know he said yes...I want to make you happy. I said work things out with your W and leave the crap alone that means do not ever call me again or..and (I could not get this out)...leave W for good. I told him you have no idea what I am going through you tell me one thing she tells me another..I said just figure it out and get back with me if you want. He said OK is that what its going to take...I said yes...I said I used to see you everyday and now its like I dont know when I am going to see you (I mean I know we see each other at least once a week). I said I cant have this. I cant sit around wait on you...I said part of me once to tell you to f- off and the other part once to wait and see what happens (becuase he is waiting for a few checks to come in - he has no where to go) he said please wait to see what happens...I said easy for you to say you want the cake and eat it too...I said sometimes you just cant.

He had to go and he said Sandy I love you...I just hung up.

IT HURTS...I had to vent if any of you guys have any advise please let me know...im confused and sad...so unlike me.

Thx - Sandy

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 3:27pm
sandy -- stand your ground. i know it hurts, but you must stand by what you've told him. he needs to take care of business. if he's leaving, leave already. and DO NOT talk to his W. just do not do it.

be firm. hang in there,

gurl

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-16-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 3:38pm
Thank you gurl...its hard...I might loose him and the thought of that hurts. I mean the reason his wife called me is becuase she thinks something is going on she does not clearly ask me that. She just wonders why MM has to talk to me all the time and that he enjoys spending time with me over her. I just told her I dont know what to tell you he is my friend and the only advise I give everyone do what makes you happy. MM told her not to call me. He asked her for a D and she said no and started getting ugly with him and when she talked to me she told me he did ask her but he begged her back. I dont know the truth to any of it. But she was like I know your going to tell my H I called you but please dont tell him I told you he was beggin me back she was like you know how men are with that they dont want to seem weak...see that makes me think thats a lie. I told her if you think I am the problem I will ask H to back away from me...she said she has asked him that and he said NO. She was like please let him know this comes from you. I said dont worry I will. I said I will do you that favor...when I approached MM about it he was like oh hell NO. I told him your W knows I am asking this of you..he was like I dont care she knows where I stand with that.

He said Sandy where do you want me to go right now...he was I have no where to go into income starts coming in...

So see part of me wants to hang on...maybe a few months...unless he decides other wise. I dont know what to do. I mean I know things to happen over night.

Hugs - Sandy

Avatar for prettyribbons4u
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 3:44pm
hey sandy, I just emailed you.....then I came here and read this. I know it hurts but I think gurl is right....you are doing the right thing, just be strong and stand your ground. I know you can do it...and don't talk to her anymore!!! I know you are getting "info" from her...but understand that it's only what she wants you to know...and most of that is probably not even the truth...I'll be thinking about you!

Hugs,

PR