Gutted

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2003
Gutted
27
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 2:23pm
Received an email from MM today. The subject said: Do not delete-please read.

I should have deleted it. In it he said, "I'm sure you feel better by ending things, but it ended after we met in the hotel room. You see for me, it was all about the hunt. Guys don't need "friends" we have buddies we golf with, drink with, play cards with. Women serve one or two purposes, to have our kids, clean our houses, and for sex. Women outside of marriage are for hunting. Once they are bagged, the hunt is over and we move on. Our wives are too focused on being the perfect little wife to no whats going on. So we have the best of both worlds. Merry Christmas"

Yes, it was a spitful email, but it hurt like hell. I believe all the lies, how could I have been SO stupid? I must have been from seeking outside of marriage I didn't have; friendship and love.

Feeling like life isn't so grand about now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2003
In reply to: life_is_grand
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 4:10pm
Life, are you going to reply to this e-mail? I'm sure he was sorry he sent it to you as soon as he pressed "send". I like to think that no matter how cruel he was to you in this e-mail, especially the timing at Christmas for you, that he is feeling even worse than you. You sure got him thinking about you. It seems that he took this break up pretty hard. I'm sorry you don't have your parents and your H is not at the top of your list. Tomorrow is another day. You just keep keeping on, time will heal you and we are here for you too! Prayers to you, C
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
In reply to: life_is_grand
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 6:39pm
deleted


Edited 3/10/2004 5:05 pm ET ET by geek_chic
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
In reply to: life_is_grand
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 7:11pm
It doesn't matter if you broke up with him or not - he has no class or maturity. Really, this is really a case of good riddance to bad rubbish. That's all I can say...
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
In reply to: life_is_grand
Wed, 12-17-2003 - 10:31pm
Yikes! I feel like I'm at a Sheryl Crow concert and the anti-guy lynch mob is approaching. If this gets ugly, I'm going to have to hide behind geek_chic - I hope she has a phaser set on stun!

No seriously LIG, I'm sorry to see this BS get thrown your way. I'm sure it's the last thing you need right now. Your X whatever is full of sh&$ and I'll tell you why. From an outsider's point of view I have everything going for me, three great kids, a fantastic career that just keeps getting better, a nice house and health to go with it all. Since I have all this, how come I feel like I'm half dead? Why? Because I have no one to share these with. My buddies at my former fire station, or the guys I hang out with during my kid's sports events could care less about any of that stuff. Only a woman could do that. My "friends" may want to know what I did to my '71 Nova that makes it run so great, but they don't care how I feel. I could never tell my inner most feelings to anyone but a woman. True there are some guys out there that take that a-hole attitude you were on the receiving end of, but I think they are few and far between. They may act tough, but when the rubber hits the road, it's all show and no go. This guy is jilted and he's pissed. But from what I have seen, he didn't pay any attention to you as of late. That's no relationship. I would have bailed too if I were you. That e-mail was meant to hurt you, otherwise it would have never been sent. As such don't hang much meaning to it.

Cheer up, it will all fade into the obscurity of history. Spend time with your kids. They are the reason why you're here, right? If it makes you feel any better I picked a real winner for a mate too. What a life! Hang in there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2003
In reply to: life_is_grand
Thu, 12-18-2003 - 1:56am
Life: He sounds like an immature a**hole, who is incapable of knowing what true intimacy and love is. He is not representative of all men and I hope you realize that. What a jerk!! I wish you the best. Someday you may be able to learn to love and trust again, with somebody who deserves you. Take care.

Virgogirl

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: life_is_grand
Thu, 12-18-2003 - 8:49am
life - he is being SPITFUL and lying to boot! and he's an immature baby who can't just say goodbye, best wishes, he has to send you a nasty email -- what a guy!!

i'm sorry this R ended this way, but you are soooo much better off without this jerk. you didn't make a mistake to seek friendship and possible love, THIS guy is just not capable of those emotions.

stop kicking yourself and move on. be open to life's possibilities, but get to know the person, even if there's a head-over-heels attraction, so you know who you're getting involved with. that's true for every R, not just As.

and for the record, most of the men i know personally are not in it for the "hunt", they are looking for friendship and companionship and possible love outside the M because the little wife is not providing it at home!

please forgive yourself and be happy. look forward, not back and have a wonderful holiday season! we're here for you honey, no matter what!

and DO NOT OPEN ANYMORE EMAILS (or any communications) from that jerk!

gurl




Edited 2/18/2004 12:09:13 PM ET by gurlfriend50
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
In reply to: life_is_grand
Thu, 12-18-2003 - 10:01am
Was I the one who man-bashed? If so, I didn't mean to say all men are rats or anything. (Even if those were my exact words!) I was just trying to say that we women are really amazing creatures and I really don't think men could live without us as much as they like to think they can. Sorry if it bothered anyone.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
In reply to: life_is_grand
Thu, 12-18-2003 - 10:09am
Bash them all you want lilah!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
In reply to: life_is_grand
Thu, 12-18-2003 - 3:48pm
Didn't bother me a bit. I know the kinda person I am, and none of that was directed at me. Yes there are some generalities that exsist, but in some cases people are just plain jerks, regardless of who they are.

I couldn't agree more with your summary.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2002
In reply to: life_is_grand
Thu, 12-18-2003 - 4:04pm
I have no idea of the story behind this - though I gather from a few responses that you broke up with him - but I can't imagine what kind of rotten human being would say such things to another.

Just know that whatever anyone says - including a jerk that you thought you had feelings for, and who you thought had them for you - you are a person worthy of love and respect. And don't for one second let this experience make you feel that all men are schmucks. It would be like having one loony woman tell her husband that she only loved him for his money, and that all women are like that. There are plenty of lovely, loving men out there. I am sorry that this particular man turned out not to be one of them.